Patio Lanterns
by Jennifer Cole
Summary: I really can't remember how I got to this point.I can't even remember two weeks ago when I went back to London for my parents funeral. And I certainly can't remember how on earth I ended up on the train leaving Hogwarts to spend Christmas with the Potters
1. Prologue: Lantern

**Summary: **I really can't remember how I got to this point. I can't remember what I had for breakfast today. I can't remember what my last lesson was. I can't remember what happened two weeks ago when I went back to London for my parents' funeral. And I certainly can't remember how on earth I ended up on the train, leaving Hogwarts for the holidays, to spend Christmas with the Potters.

This story takes places in the 2nd half of the Marauder's last year of school & continues until just before Lily & James' death. It will be written in entirely Lily's point of view. Rating will be changed to M for later chapters.

**Disclaimer: **This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

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><p><strong>"Patio Lanterns<strong>**"**

_By: Jennifer Cole_

– **Prologue: Lantern – **

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><p>I really can't remember how I got to this point. I can't remember what I had for breakfast today. I can't remember what my last lesson of the term was yesterday. I can't remember what happened two weeks ago when I went back to London for my parents' funeral. And I certainly can't remember how on earth I ended up on the train, leaving Hogwarts for the holidays, to spend Christmas with the Potters.<p>

I sighed and leaned back into the seat cushions as the Hogwarts Express bumped along the track, speeding towards London. I shifted my gaze from the snow covered landscape that rolled past as the train chugged along to the boy sitting silently across from me.

He was watching me with a careful eye, as if I would spontaneously combust at any moment and disappear into thin air or, more likely, burst into another round of inconsolable tears that would shake my body for hours on end.

Thankfully I felt so dry inside that I didn't think I had another tear to spare. I slowly moved my gaze up from the boy's uniform shirt, past the shiny Head Boy badge pinned to his vest, up above his hazel brown eyes hiding behind thin rimmed glasses, to rest on the top of his head which was covered in messy black hair sticking up in all different directions.

Yes, James Potter, Head Boy, my enemy, the person I loathed most in the entire school, was sitting across from me in a compartment on the Hogwarts Express, as we both headed back to London to spend the Holidays at his mansion with his folks.

"Alright Lily?" The caution in his voice was not lost on me. His eyes bore into mine and I could see the sympathy and sadness just beneath the surface of the melted hazel floating behind his glasses.

I tried to find my voice, hoping it didn't come out all cracked and broken. "Alright," I squeaked. Yup, two weeks of crying really doesn't leave you with much of a voice.

"You need anything?" His voice was still cautious and quiet, as if my ears were also cracked and broken.

Not wanting to embarrass myself by squeaking again, I settled for shaking my head. I turned my face to look out the window again, thinking again about how I had gotten to this point. I had vague memories of a letter from my sister declaring the deaths' of my parents, of sitting in the Heads' Common Room with my eyes so blurred with tears I couldn't tell who had taken me into their arms as I wept, of falling asleep in a bed that most certainly wasn't mine (even through the crying I knew that I would never have bedsheets with Snitches on them), and of James Potter being nice to me. In fact, as much as I hated to admit it, if it wasn't for James Potter, I highly doubted I would have made it these two weeks.

It wasn't as if James and me were never nice to each other... in fact, this year, when we were both made Head students, we had been getting along quiet well. James had seemed to have matured since I last remembered seeing him in sixth year. And although he and his friends, the Marauders, were still mysterious and troublesome, James was doing an excellent job as Head Boy. Not once did I have to remind him about meetings, patrols or rules. He had not complained once and had really taken his newly appointed position to heart.

Although I was leery at first that this new James Potter was just a ruse, James' actions after the death of my parents had only solidified my new found appreciation for him. In the past two weeks I had been quite the zombie; only getting up in the morning because James would shake me awake and push me towards the shower, only going to class because James would carry my bag and guide me along with his arm against my back, only passing classes because James would copy his notes out twice so I had a copy, only eating because James would bring food from the Great Hall up to our Head Dorm for me to eat, and only going to sleep because James would rub my back soothingly as I cried into the late hours of the night.

I really didn't know why I deserved being treated so nicely. I had been nothing but rude, demanding and unappreciative towards him all term. He was probably being forced by Dumbledore to be polite to me. But, of course, that did not explain why I was now facing two weeks at the Potters' family mansion for the holidays. I don't even remember agreeing to come along.

_James was holding me and stroking my hair as I sobbed,"I... j..just want t..to sleep and n..not wake up!" I felt so tired. So tired of crying. So tired of suffering. So tired of living._

_ James froze and turned my face so I had no choice but to blink through my tears to bring his face into focus. "Don't you dare say that! You have so much to live for! I know it's hard now but it will get better. Don't you ever think about giving up. That's what Voldemort wants... is for us to suffer so much that we give up. You have to keep fighting. Fight to avenge your parents. Fight to avenge everyone who has lost a parent, a brother or a sister. Fight for the future. Fight for our future."_

_I stared up into his warm eyes, thinking how I probably looking like a drowned rat, and sniffled. "I don't think I have any fight left in me." I whispered._

_ James kissed the top of my head and said, "I will fight for the both of us while you get better." Then he jumped up from my bed and began shoving my belongings into my trunk._

_"What are you doing?" I cried pathetically as I watched him throw a couple pairs of my sneakers into my trunk._

_ Opening my wardrobe doors, James began pulling my shirts and pants off the hangers and tossing them on top of my shoes. "I'm packing your trunk for you. I wouldn't want you to be without your stuff when you come spend the holidays at my place."_

After that night, I really hadn't cried much. Well, I still cried a lot but not as much as I had the two weeks prior. It didn't even occur to me that I would refuse James' invitation to spend the holidays with his family. It was like James was letting me share his family since I longer had one of my own.

I turned back away from the window to look at him again. He was leaning back against the seat with is eyes closed. His black hair splayed across the red seat cushions. His eyelashes lay smoothly against the skin of his cheeks. His breaths were even and slow. I wondered if he was sleeping. I quietly got up and shuffled forward to sit down next to him. His left eye popped open to look down at me as I snuggled up against him. He let his left arm drop around my waist and hold me close as his eyes drooped closed again.

I closed my eyes, relishing in the feeling of being held like a child. I sighed deeply. My parents would never hold me again. They would never give me advice again. I would never again hear my father telling me how proud he was of me. I would never again laugh with my mother as we baked together in the kitchen, spilling brownie batter as we licked the baking spoons. Gone were the days when my father would comfort me when I didn't receive an Outstanding on an exam. Gone were the days when my mother would bandage me up and kiss my sorrows away. Gone were the two guiding lanterns in my life.

I cuddled up against James and buried my face into his vest. At that moment I knew that I would not cry again for my parents. I had someone new to comfort me, to laugh with me, to be proud of me.

When the train stopped in London, I would awake from the coma I had been in for the past two weeks. I would hold my head high and I would go with James to meet his family. And I knew that if I felt lost again, I only had to look up to see my new lantern waiting for me.

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><p><strong>AN:** This short chapter was just a prologue to introduce the story. This story has 16 full chapters to come. Please R&R to let me know if you like it and if you want me to post more!


	2. Chapter 1: Biggest Patio

**Summary: **"Is that my jersey?" I giggled. Oops. I had forgotten I was wearing that.

This story takes places in the 2nd half of the Marauder's last year of school & continues until just before Lily & James' death. It will be written in entirely Lily's point of view. Rating will be changed to M for later chapters.

**Disclaimer: **This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

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><p><strong>"Patio Lanterns"<strong>

_By: Jennifer Cole_

– **Chapter 1: Biggest Patio –**

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><p>I stumbled slightly as the portkey released us back into existence. We had just jumped using the portkey from the platform at King's Cross because I hadn't learned to apparate yet. James caught my elbow, straightening me back up, as I gazed up at where we had appeared.<p>

My eyes peaked through the heavy wrought-iron gate and up the winding stone path towards the largest house I had ever seen. Ever. Actually, it wasn't a house... it was a mansion. Biggest mansion I had ever seen. It was sitting uphill a bit from where we stood, it's grey stone exterior rising high above the top of the gate. The massive gardens on either side of the stone path spanned across the entire front of the property. Alder, Hornbeam and Scots Pine trees speckled the gardens peaking out from the white blanket of snow. In the middle of the front gardens there was a large pond surrounded by beautiful frozen wildflowers. Even from a distance I could spot the purple tops of the Loosestrifes and the pink flowers of Ragged Robins enchased in ice crystals.

I dragged my eyes away from the beautiful gardens to look up at the Potter mansion. I could easily spot how each bedroom on the second floor had it's own balcony overlooking the expansive front gardens. I could see how each window was dressed with dark draping curtains and how each balcony had it's own miniature potted christmas tree. I could even see the sparkling lights on the main christmas tree that stood tall in the double story windows at the front of the house.

I brought my gaze back to the front gate. One either side of the gate hung a single lantern. I felt the corners of my mouth jerk upwards at the irony. It had been just a few hours ago that I had thought of James as my personal lantern.

Turning my head back towards James, I watched as he pulled his wand out and waved it in a complicated motion in front of the gate. There was an odd sort of clanking and then the gate seemed to melt away in a swirl of yellow light revealing an unimpeded view of the gardens inside.

"Ready?" James asked, his word hanging in a puff of warm steam in the freezing night air. He grabbed the handles to both of our trunks and wheeled them around to face the now open gate.

I nodded my head as I stepped through the gate after James. Looking back I watched as the gate seemed to grow back closed like rapidly blooming black vines. With a _clunk_ the gate closed completely and the lanterns outside dimmed.

As I turned back towards James, to walk forward towards the front of the house, fifty more lanterns seemed to burst to life amidst the garden. The twinkling lights lit the entire front lawn making each ice crystal sparkle. There were tread marks in the snow trailing behind the two trunks James was towing, his footprints scattered between. I quickened my step to keep up with him, listening to the crunch my boots made in the snow as we walked in silence towards the giant double front doors.

The closer we got, the more nervous I began to feel. _What a stupid idea it was to barge in on James' family christmas! I don't even know his parents! James and me aren't even really friends! _I thought furiously as I shuffled my boots along in the snow. I sneaked a glance sideways at James. He was facing forward, the corners of his lips turned upwards, his eyes sparkling in the twinkling lights of the lanterns.

Before I was ready, we were at the massive wooden front doors. I could see the large metal knockers in the middle of each door, shaped appropriately as a lion's head. I could only assume what house the Potters' were all in and, in that moment, I was extremely happy that I was a Gryffindor too.

"Are you ready?" James asked me as he adjusted my crooked scarf for me. I stood still as he flattened down my wild hair... I couldn't even remember brushing it this morning.

I swallowed deeply and brought my eyes up to meet his. "Yes. I'm ready." I said, thanking Merlin when my voice didn't crack. "And thank you," I added on in a near whisper.

I wasn't sure if James heard me or not as he reached his hand out to open the front door. But before he could even reach the iron handle the door swung open on it's on accord, letting out a gust of warm air.

Standing in the warmly lit doorway were, what had to be, James' parents. The first thing I noticed was that James' parents were much older than mine had been. They had to both be at least in their mid-fifties, if not older. Mr. Potter stood slightly taller than James (who himself was a good 6'3") with the same high cheekbones. His face was aged and worn but his eyes, the same color as James', twinkled with a youthful spirit behind his glasses. His hair, although greying with age, was a dark brown shade. He was thin and dressed in dark grey slacks with a festive red vest hidden under a nice black cloak. The cloak clip was a pair of golden lions paws.

Mrs. Potter was quite a bit shorter than James' father, but was by no means short. She still towered over my pathetic 5'4" and looked slightly more stern than James' father. Her eyes, although slightly pulled down in the corners by the onset of wrinkles, were alive and calculating. Her lips were adorned with a rouge lipstick and her black hair (also streaked with grey) was tied back in a pretty twist, a golden poinsettia hairpiece fastened to the side. Her nose was a carbon copy of the nose on James' face. She was thin and dressed in a lovely long-sleeved christmas gown, speckled with gold threads and stitched mistletoe. She was quite beautiful and combined with James' father I could easily see where James got his good looks from.

_Wait! What did I just think? Did I honestly just use the words 'James' and 'good looks' in the same sentence?_

"Welcome to our home!" Mr. Potter interrupted my frantic thoughts with his greeting, extending his hand in welcome.

"Er... hi. Nice to meet you Mr. and Mrs. Potter. I'm Lily Evans," I introduced sloppily, almost tripping over my feet as I hastened to pull off my gloves and step forward to shake the man's hand.

I could hear James chuckle as I stumbled, his hand catching my elbow and helping me balance as I shook Mr. Potter's hand.

"Oh please! No need to be so formal!" Mrs. Potter laughed as she pulled me into a hug. "Call me Elizabeth! And my husband is Henry," She patted me across the back beaming down at me.

"Er... okay," I flushed as Mrs. Potter... er Elizabeth... released me. I stumbled back a few steps to stand next to James.

James laughed slightly as he stepped forward to hug his father and kiss his mother. "Come on. Don't embarrass the poor girl!" He smirked back at me, his eyes brighter than I had ever seen them.

"Well come on in, let's get you two settled!" Mr. Potter snapped his fingers and immediately several house elves appeared, hurrying forward to gather up our trunks. I noticed each of the elves were dressed in festive christmas outfits, the males with little knit sweaters and the girls wearing little red skirts decorated with tuffs of white. "Let's go to the kitchens and get something to warm you two up," James' parents started off down the hall.

James placed his hand on the small of my back and urged me forward to follow his parents. I looked back at our trunks quickly, watching as the house elves gathered them up, three elves per trunk.

"The elves will be fine. Don't worry," James said, answering my unasked question.

I nodded and let James guide me through the main hall, turning left near the end, down three steps and into the sunken kitchen. I'm fairly certain my mouth hit the floor as it dropped open at the sight of such a big kitchen. There had to be at least twenty house elves in this room, jostling about, preparing what looked like a feast for a hundred people.

James laughed, probably at the sight of my face. "They are preparing for our family christmas dinner for tomorrow,"

My eyes bugged at the sight of three house elves, one standing on top of another, the top elf stirring something bubbling in a huge pot on the stove.

"How many people do have in your family?" I asked watching as another pair of elves were rolling out a massive piece of dough across a wooden counter.

James laughed and pushed me towards another small door to our right. "Just three. But, of course, with you here as our guest there is four,"

I went through the wooden door into a smaller kitchen area. There was a small wooden island with four bar stools around it. Mrs. Potter was stirring something with her wand on the stove.

James dropped his arm from my back and hopped up into one of the bar stools. "Don't forget I like chocolate syrup on top of mine!" James called to his mother as he waved me over to sit next to him.

Mrs. Potter's mouth opened in a smile. "Of course! How could I forget?" She slid a mug of hot chocolate in front of James and then one in front of me.

I starred down into the deep pewter mug, it's contents steaming up into my face. I wrapped my hands around it's exterior and sighed at the warmth that escaped through it into my hand.

Mr. and Mrs. Potter joined us on the two spare stools on the opposite side of the island. I watched as James gulped down some of his hot chocolate. I simply held mine between my hands, letting the steam from it rise to warm my cold nose.

"So Lily, James tells us you are Head Girl at Hogwarts?" Mr. Potter... erm... Henry asked.

I nodded, then realizing I wasn't being very social I added, "Yes, I work along with James."

Elizabeth laughed slightly as she sipped her own warm drink. "How's that working out for you? I hope James isn't making you do all the work."

James choked slightly on his hot chocolate and came up looking outraged at his mother. "Mom! I do stuff! I'm an amazing Head Boy! Tell her Lily!"

I took a small sip of my hot chocolate. It was warm and sweet and felt so good in my throat. "Don't worry, James is doing just fine." Then remembering I should be social I added, "He hasn't forgotten one meeting. I was actually sort of surprised." I took at sideways glance at James who gave me his trademark lopsided smirk before gulping down another swallow of hot chocolate.

Elizabeth chuckled and then, with a glint of mischief in her eyes, said "Well I hope James hasn't been trailing after you like a love-sick puppy all year. I tell him every September 1st to leave poor Lily Evans alone, but he never listens."

"MOM!" James exclaimed, having the decently to flush in my presence.

Of course, news about James' obsessive crush on me wasn't new. James had been asking me out for a date since third year. And I had been rejecting him since third year. But when James had returned to school for our final year, I was under the impression that his new found maturity came twofold with the end of his obsessive boyish crush. He hadn't, after all, asked me out all year.

"Don't worry, Elizabeth," I found myself saying. "James and I are just friends." I could call him my friend now, couldn't I? Friends are the sort of people who let you cry all over them for two weeks straight. Yes, I would say we were friends. "I think after my eighty-six rejections he kind of got the hint." I had counted.

Henry laughed and smacked James on the back, causing James to choke on his hot chocolate. Again. "Ouch son. Eighty-six."

James had finally managed to clear his airway. "Ya well, I was a bit childish back then, wasn't I?" He smirked at me sideways, using his mug to hide it from his parents.

"You think?" I laughed, taking a small sip out of my own mug. Laughing felt so good. I had been afraid that I had almost forgotten how to laugh.

Elizabeth and Henry finished their drinks and they placed their mugs in the sink. Elizabeth kissed James on top of his head and Henry patted James on the back.

"We are heading up for the night. James, you'll show Lily to her room?" Henry said at the doorway.

"Sure thing," James replied turning back to take one last swallow of his hot chocolate.

Elizabeth stopped to place a hand on my shoulder. "I am really sorry about your loss, Lily. Please let us know if there is anything we can do."

I blinked up at her, wondering why my eyes weren't filling with tears. My breath hitched as I panicked, thinking I was beginning to forget them.

" Thanks," I replied, my voice low and small.

Elizabeth gave me a small smile. "It does get easier," She told me. "And just because it gets easier, doesn't mean you won't always miss them. It's okay to start feeling alive again."

I nodded, my eyes now wet and stinging.

"Good night," Elizabeth kissed me on top of my head as well before she left, letting the door swing close on her way out.

I turned to look back at James. He was looking at me with patient eyes, a small smile gracing the corners of his lips. "It's okay if you want to cry again," He said.

But I shook my head. Here with James, at his house, with his family, I didn't feel as sad as I did earlier on the train. I had wept enough the past few weeks and I was ready to move on. Elizabeth's words hung in my mind, like a spider suspended from a web. _Just because it gets easier, doesn't mean you won't always miss them_. I was going to miss them. But I was going to miss more by not moving on with my life.

"I'm not going to cry," My voice came out strong. "I'm done crying," My voice was getting stronger. "I'm ready to try to move on."

James smiled and slid his arm around me. I leaned into him feeling, for the first time in a long time, that I was content. "I'm here to help," He said, again being so nice that I felt it was undeserved. But I was too selfish to say anything about it.

"Are you ready to head up? I can show you to your room." He smirked. "I know you will like it,"

"Why?" I asked, cautious of the Marauder glint that was reappearing in his eyes.

He jumped down from his bar stool and waved me to follow his lead. "You'll see!"

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><p>James was wrong. I didn't like my room. I loved it! It was a massive bedroom with a large four-poster king-sized bed in the middle with heavy red drapes hanging from the posts. Past the bed were a pair of large double glass doors that opened onto the balcony. I could see the small potted christmas tree just outside the doors. The wall opposite the bed there were several books shelves filled to the brim with wizard children's stories. I excitedly squealed as I spotted my personal favorite "<em>The Fountain of Fair Fortune<em>", which I read for the first time just this year, when I had spotted James' copy left out in our Head Common Room. In fact, I had never even known that wizard children had their own fairy tales until this year. Thinking about it now, it made perfect sense that wizards would tell their children fairy tales.

James laughed as I grabbed the book off the shelf. "I knew that you haven't read many of the wizard fairy tales, so I had the house elves bring a selection of them up to your room."

I placed the book on the little night-table beside my bed to read later and then smiled up at James. "Thanks, that was really thoughtful."

"Of course," James replied walked over to a door on the far side of the room. "The bathroom is through here. The house elves keep it stocked so everything you could need will be in there."

I nodded sitting down on the edge of the bed. I wondered how James could possibly live in a such a big house. I had never really thought about it but it made sense that James' family was wealthy. I knew, from what many others had told me, that the Potters were an old wizarding family. I was beginning to understand that old meant money.

"Where is your room?" I asked James as he walked over to sit with me on the bed.

"Just across the hall," The trademark smirk reappeared. "Why thinking about sneaking in while I'm sleeping?"

"No," I laughed. His humour, which I had once found annoying and childish, was starting to grow on me. "Just wondering in case I need something,"

James drew me into a hug carefully, as though I might break. "You'll be okay tonight?" He asked.

I didn't need to ask why he was asking such a question. He had spent every night with me for the past two weeks, soothing me as I cried. Although the prospect of sleeping alone was not one I was looking forward to, I replied "Ya, I'll be fine."

James smiled, wishing me good-night, then headed out to his own room closing my door with a snap as he left.

I got up and moved over to the foot of the bed where the house elves had put my trunk. I fumbled around for something that looked like pajamas. I tossed several pairs of sneakers onto the floor as I dug deep into the trunk that James had packed. Which evidently did not include pajamas. I sighed as I got up wondering what to do. I spotted a wardrobe on the far wall near the door to the bathroom. Leaving my clothes strewn out on the floor, I scrambled to my feet and made my way over to the wardrobe. I pulled open the double doors to find several old Quidditch jerseys handing inside. All were red with gold with _Potter_ stitched across the back. I assumed they were James' old Quidditch uniforms that he had simply outgrown.

I pulled the smallest one I could see off the hanger, closed the wardrobe and headed into the bathroom for a bath. The bathroom was huge (although at this point I should have known better than to be surprised by the the size of the rooms in the Potter mansion). It was dressed in speckled marble. There was a large soaking tub in the far corner, a stack of fresh white towels sitting on the edge.

I placed James' jersey onto the sink cabinet and then stepped forward to draw the bath. As the warm water began to steam the room, I looked around for some soaps. I spotted a neat stack of bottles on the wooden table next to the sink and grabbed a nice pink looking bottle, squeezing some of it's contents into the bathwater. Immediately the tube began to bubble. I couldn't even remember the last time I had had a bubble bath. When I was four and my mother still bathed me?

I shook my head, trying not to think about my parents, and began to undress leaving my dirty clothes in a heap piled in front of the sink. I stepped into the warm bathwater, turning off the taps, and sinking down into the warmth.

I tried hard not to think of anything, to keep my mind blank. But I just couldn't. I had been having nightmares since my parents' funeral. Every time I closed my eyes all I could see were images of my parents, dead on the floor, eyes wide open. I could see flashes of green light and could almost hear a sinister laugh. It had been Voldemort who had murdered my parents. I was only grateful that my sister wasn't home when it happened.

After twenty minutes of soaking I got out of the bath, toweled myself dry and shrugged into the jersey I had found. It drooped down off my shoulders, the golden hem reaching half-way down my thighs. I stood looking into the hazy mirror, my wet red hair sticking to my cheeks. I searched in the sink drawers for a comb and upon finding one began pulling it through my long locks. My green eyes were still red and bloodshot, a result of my two-week crying stint.

Retrieving my wand from my dirty pants pocket, I swirled it over my head to dry my hair quickly. As I brushed my teeth, I tried not to think about going out into the cold bedroom and crawling into a strange bed all by myself. I stalled in the warm bathroom, gazing at my reflection in the mirror, not really seeing anything. I wondered if James would actually mind if I went to his room.

Giving up, I left the bathroom and went into the cool bedroom. I walked straight past the big bed, opened the doors to the hall and stepped out onto the cold hardwood floors outside. I closed my bedroom doors as quietly as I could and tiptoed across the hall. I stood with my hand on the handle to James' room, frozen, not sure if I should knock first or just go in.

_Are you a Gryffindor or not? Where is your courage?_

As my fingers picked at the red jersey I was wearing, I gathered up my courage and pulled the door open just enough to slid through, closing the door behind me.

James' room was slightly smaller than my guest room had been. It was dark but I could see enough in the dim light to spot the posters stuck to the walls, the clothes heaped in piles on the floor, and James laying on his side in bed facing away from me. I shivered slightly as I tiptoed forward towards his bed. James was sleeping on the far side so, as gently as I could, I lifted the corner of the blankets, slid my toes under and curled up in his bed, my back to James.

I snuggled into the blankets feeling like ice. Even though I had just had a warm bath, I felt so chilled. It wasn't a minute before I felt the bed shift. I froze and began to panic thinking that he was going to, any second, kick me out. Then James' warm arms came around me, hugging me to him. He tucked his face into my hair and whispered "Good night Lily,"

For the first time that day, I felt warm both on the inside and out.

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><p>"AHHH!" I screamed, as I suddenly woke up. Something was licking my face. I tried move backwards into the centre of the bed but something (or should I say someone) was blocking my way.<p>

"What happened?" James yelped as he sat up straight in the bed, his hair sticking up in black spikes on top of his head.

I had raised my hand to defend my face from the licking attack so I couldn't see much. I could feel the bed shift as James leaned forward, one of his arms reaching across me to steady himself on the edge of the bed.

"Oh. That." I could hear the smile in his voice. "Happy Christmas Lily!" I felt the bed shift again as James leaned back into the centre of the bed.

I struggled up onto my elbow and peaked through my fingers to look down at the furry white creature looking up at me. I reached down with both my hands and scooped up the licking monster. It was a fluffy white cat with grey stripes with a big red bow tied around it's neck. It's little pink nose was wet and it's black beady eyes gleamed at me.

"Aw!" I cooed, scratching the little thing on it's head. I was rewarded by a purring sound. "This is for me?"

James laughed as he leaned back against the headboard and reaching out the scratch the cat's ear. "She was SUPPOSE to be downstairs under the tree for you. But I guess she got out of the living room."

I smiled down at the cute little thing as it cuddled up in my arms, purring contently. I'd never had a pet before. Even when I was young, my parents had been very adamant about not having pets in the household. I took a deep breath and reminded myself that it was a new day.

"I know you've never had a pet before," James said as he took his hand back from the little fur-ball in my arms. "So I figured having your first pet would help you to start over."

I smiled at how flawless his thinking had been. I couldn't even remember ever telling him that I had never had a pet. I looked down at the snoozing little cat feeling like I had started a new family. "What should I call her?"

James shrugged thoughtfully. "How about Danica? It means..."

"Morning star," I interrupted. "I took astrology too, James."

James gave me a kind smile. "I just thought it was appropriate since morning is like starting new,"

I agreed. "Danica it is," I cooed to the sleeping mass of fur in my arms. I felt like the name couldn't be anymore appropriate. I really did feel like I was starting over again.

"Is that my jersey?"

I giggled. Oops. I had forgotten I was wearing that.

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><p><em>Thud thud thud. <em>There was a distinct pounding at my door.

"I'm coming!" I answered quickly pulling a green jumper over my head.

James' head appeared through the crack in my door. "Hurry up! I want to go down to open presents with my folks!"

I hopped on one foot as I jammed a sock onto my other foot. Danica meowed at me, watching lazily from my bed. _She's probably making fun of how ridiculous I look hopping around_. I thought furiously. Finally, having both socks on I kissed Danica on her head and then raced out the door, into the hall, to follow James downstairs to meet his parents' by the christmas tree.

"Thanks again for Danica," I told James sincerely as we tread down the wide marble stairway. "She's perfect!"

James smiled at me. "She's part Kneazle, just so you know."

"Oh?" That explained why her tail ended in a tuff like a lion. "So she'll be a handful then," I said.

"No more than you are," James laughed as he bounced down a couple steps ahead of me. We got to the doors to the living room at the same time. I straightened out my green jumper and flattened down my curly red hair. I had even put gold earrings in this morning. Everything in the Potters' house seemed to be gold.

James pushed the doors open and bounded into the two story living room. The christmas tree stood in the corner, it's lights twinkling in the sunlight that streamed through the windows. It was wrapped in red and gold ribbons with many colorful glass ornaments. A big gold star sparkled on the top. Beneath the tree were dozens of gifts, all wrapped in colorful papers and ribbons.

Beside the tree there was a massive stone fireplace with a warm fire roaring just inside the grate. The room had two armchairs, currently occupied by Elizabeth and Henry, and a large red sofa, which I decided was appropriate for me to sit on.

James jumped forward to the tree, ignoring the couch completely and sitting on the floor. "Happy Christmas!" He bellowed as he tossed a gift to each of his parents.

I felt slightly guilty for intruding on their personal family christmas. I hadn't brought any gifts and I felt like a horrible guest.

James was coming to sit by me now a large red package in his hands. He held it out to me, smiling.

I shook my head at him. "I didn't bring any gifts!" I hissed under my breath. I wished the couch would swallow me up into it's cushions. James winked at me.

"Oh Lily! Thank you!" Elizabeth exclaimed holding out a beautiful gold scarf with intricate flowers stitched into it. "You shouldn't have!"

I blinked stupidly at her, too shocked to say anything. James elbowed me in the side. "You're welcome," I squeaked. Apparently I had brought gifts. I made myself a promise to pay James back later.

And my generosity hadn't stopped there. I had also gotten Henry a leather holster, with a gold "P" etched into it, for his wand (which James later informed me was a useful gift as his Dad was Head of the Auror Department at the Ministry).

The Potters' were generous as well. I had received a beautiful dark green bathrobe, a pair of small golden holly shaped earrings, and a little red collar for Danica.

The house elves brought in treats for us to eat while we opened gifts. I sampled some treacle tart and sipped some warm tea. James had many presents from his parents and friends which included a new broomstick, robes, Quidditch posters, sweets, and a weird silver whirling instrument, that I'd read about in a book once, called a sneakoscope.

After gifts, James insisted that I come out into the gardens with him for a walk. I fought for ages to not go out into the cold, but thirty minutes later I found myself facing the front doors bundled up in my cloak, boots, scarf, mittens and hat. I glared at James as he happily grabbed my hand and pulled me along with him, outside into the cold air.

It was cold, but nice. The sun was bright and warm and shown like diamonds off the ice crystals of the newly fallen snow. James pulled me along around the the side of the house, our boots crunching loudly in the snow. We rounded the corner and climbed the few steps onto a raised patio. The biggest patio I had ever seen in my entire life. You could have fit my entire house on that patio.

James dropped my hand so he could clammer onto his new broomstick. I shook my head at him, laughing, as he took off into the cold winter air. I plopped down into the deep snow, spreading myself out like a star. I looked into the sky watching as James shot past overhead.

I smiled, as James flew by again waving down at me. I moved my arms and legs so that they would make a trench in the snow in the shape of an angel.

"You look like an angel!" James yelled down at me, from the spot he was floating at, twenty feet above me.

"Oh, har har!" I yelled back, carefully moving away from my snow angel, so as not to crush my masterpiece.

As I looked down at my snow angel, I suddenly felt something cold and wet slam into the back of my neck. I whipped around searching for the source of the snowball and spotted James ducking behind a snow-covered bench.

"You are so going to get it!" I shouted, gathering up some snow to make a snowball of my own. I grabbed my wand out of my pants pocket and waved it at the snow in front of me. Several more snowballs immediately formed on the ground.

Smiling I aimed my wand at the bench where James was hiding and waited. Just as James' head poked out from the top of the bench, I commanded "_Mobiliarbus!" _My group of well formed snowballs pelleted towards his face.

"Eek!" James screamed, as two of my snowballs got him in the face. "I surrender!" He yelped, ducking down to the ground with his arms over his head in an attempt to protect himself, in case any more flying hunks of snow found their way to his face.

I laughed loudly as I stepped towards him, victorious.

"You cheat!" James exclaimed as he got up, brushing snow out off of his neck.

I laughed as I slid my wand back into my pocket. "Since when is magic cheating?" I asked, raising my eyebrows at him.

James cocked his head sideways, shaking his hair with his hands. Bits of snow fell from his head and floated down onto the ground. "I never knew that Lily Evans could be so mischievous!" James laughed as he righted himself, satisfied that he got all the snow out of his hair.

"I do know spells other than the ones we learn in class." I defended myself. "I do _read_,"

The lopsided smirk again. "Of course you do,"

I glared at him, the rim of my hat falling forward into my eyes, ruining the menacing effect I was going for. James laughed more.

"Shut up," I grumbled as I turned past him to stomp back across the patio, towards the house.

"Hey!" He shouted after me. I could hear the crunching of his boots as he jogged to keep up with me. "Where are you going?"

"Back inside," I answered, pushing the hat back out of my eyes. "I'm cold."

"Aw," James muttered. "You're a spoilsport."

I glared at him. "No. I just hate the cold!"

"Well we might as well head inside because the elves will have the feast ready soon," James told me, rubbing his stomach for effect. "I'm starving!"

I giggled. "You're always hungry."

"I'm a growing boy!" He said defensively, as he pushed the front doors open, stepping aside to let me through first.

"You're 6'3" and seventeen years old. I think you are finished growing by now." I told him, kicking off my boots just inside the doors.

"Too bad you finished growing when you were thirteen," James snorted as he slung his jacket and scarf over a hook on the coat rack.

"Hey!" I said back defensively. My height (or lack of) was a touchy subject for me. All my friends towered above me. Well not towered, but they were all taller! Although, it wasn't hard to be taller than 5'4". "It's not my fault I'm vertically challenged," I handed James my coat and winter wear to add to the coat rack to dry.

"Love, you're not vertically challenged at all. You're just short."

I didn't speak to him all the way to the dining hall.

* * *

><p>"I'm so full!" I pushed my chair back in emphasis. "This was the best dinner I've ever had!"<p>

James shrugged. "Hogwarts is better," He shoveled another forkful of potatoes into his mouth.

"Don't let the house elves hear you! Or else there might be poison in your breakfast." Henry warned, chortling at the thought.

I felt so good. This was the first real meal I had eaten in ages. Turkey, yams, potatoes, beans, tarts, pies... Mmmm! The overwhelming amount of food was making me feel slightly sleepy.

As the house elves came in to clear off the table, the Potters' moved back into the living room to sit by the fire. I snuggled into the big red sofa, hoping James would come sit next to me. But he continued forward to pull one last gift out from under the christmas tree.

James excitedly brought the medium-sized flat box over to me. "Thanks for coming to spend the holidays with us," James told me as he handed me the gift. "This is for the second week of holidays!"

Although I strongly felt as though it should be me who was thanking him, I opened the top of the box and peaked in with a confused expression. Inside the box was a green bikini. I felt the heat rise in my face. What was James suggesting?

I looked up at the Potters' in confusion.

Elizabeth laughed. "Didn't James tell you? We always spend the second week of the Christmas Holidays in southern France!"

Well then, that would explain the bikini.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Chapter 1 complete! Yay! And don't you just love Christmas? In the letter Lily wrote to Sirius (the one Harry found in Sirius' old bedroom in OoTP... or was it HBP?), Lily mentions that she has a cat. So I thought now was a good a time as any to add the cat into the story.

At this point, it is pretty obvious that Lily and James are over their hatred of each other. I couldn't bring myself to start another story where they were on last name basis.

_**Thank you to everyone who has reviewed my story so far. It puts a smile on my face to know that people really do read what I write. Thank you!**_

This story has 15 more chapters to come. Please R&R to let me know if you like it and if you want me to post more!


	3. Chapter 2: Summer Shade

**Summary: **Sirius bounced in his seat. "What are _some-ores_?" He asked. Throwing him an exasperated look I replied, "Not _some-ores_! _S'mores!_ Honestly! Didn't you ever take Muggle Studies?"

This story takes places in the 2nd half of the Marauder's last year of school & continues until just before Lily & James' death. It will be written in entirely Lily's point of view. Rating will be changed to M for later chapters.

**Disclaimer: **This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

* * *

><p><strong>"Patio Lanterns"<strong>

_By: Jennifer Cole_

– **Chapter 2: Summer Shade –**

* * *

><p>"I don't think I'll need those in France," I told James as he was packing a pile of thick black cloaks into my trunk. We were in my guest room at the Potter Mansion, James passing me clothes to add to my trunk.<p>

"We aren't coming back here after France," James told me, as I took the cloaks he was passing to me and placed them on top of a neatly folded stack of school uniforms. "We will be taking a portkey back to Hogsmeade and then the carriages back to Hogwarts."

"Oh, so we are spending the whole week in France?" I asked, reaching forward to grab the stack of socks James was holding out to me.

James nodded. "Ya, Sirius usually comes with us but this year you're coming instead."

A twinge of guilt swirled in my stomach. Was I taking Sirius' spot on the vacation?

James seemed to read my mind and continued, "Sirius has to go to his cousin's wedding." He explained.

"I thought Sirius didn't get along with his family?" I remembered hearing stories about Sirius being an outcast in his own family. Of course, I knew a lot of the Black family as they had attended Hogwarts as well. All of the Black's had been in Slytherin save for Sirius who had, for obvious reasons, ended up in Gryffindor. I could remember back to a time in third year when Bellatrix Black (who was a seventh year at the time) had threatened me and another muggleborn girl while we were in Hogsmeade one weekend. I shuddered at the thought.

"He doesn't," James responded. Tossing me a pair of my Mary-Janes so I could fit them into my trunk. "But for a wedding this big, even if we have suspicions about the bride and groom being Death Eaters, everyone goes. Even the Minister himself."

I didn't need to ask what James meant by big. History of Magic had, at least, taught me about the power of pureblood and the effects it had on the wizarding society. From within the safety of Hogwarts walls we were all hearing rumors about a rising Dark Wizard, named Voldemort, who was determined to stomp out people with dirty blood, like myself. We had heard about the Death Eaters, a group of loyal followers who existed to do Voldemort's bidding. Hogwarts had seen, first hand, the effects of pureblood obsession. My parents, themselves, had been victims of a war that should never have broke into the non-magic world. Even still, being muggleborn had put me on the outside of many conversations and I still didn't fully understand it. "Bellatrix is a Death Eater?" I asked, slightly in shock.

James nodded. "Everyone knows it. Her fiancee, Rodolphus Lestrange, is a bit older than she is and has been suspected of being a Death Eater since the day he graduated."

"Then why do they let him walk free if everyone knows he's working with Voldemort?" I asked, thoroughly confused by the way wizarding laws worked.

James sighed. "They have no way of proving that he is a Death Eater." James passed me some folded skirts.

"How come?" I asked. "Isn't that what Aurors do? Find out about Death Eaters."

James chuckled. "In theory. But it's hard to commit someone of an attack or murder if they aren't in the act of committing it."

I nodded. Things were so different in the wizarding world. I was used to a world where _Scotland Yard_ would investigate murders and forensic scientists would evaluate the crime scene. Of course, with magic, there never was much evidence. A swish of a wand and a flash of green light was all it took to be rid of someone forever. I closed my eyes and I could see the bodies of my parents and that green haze that hung over their bodies. I took a deep breath and tried to steer my mind in another direction.

"What are wizard weddings like?" I asked James, figuring he had been to one before.

James laughed slightly as he tossed me his Quidditch jersey... the one I had taken to sleeping in. "They are extravagant. Everyone wears dress robes, the ceremony involves the crossing of wands for the bride and groom, formal dancing... Why? Fancy having a wedding?" James joked, his grin all crooked and lopsided.

I shot my best glare at him, but it lacked the harshness it once possessed.

James laughed as he picked up the last article of clothing to be added to my trunk. Shifting some books around in my trunk, I wasn't paying attention to him until I heard him give a low whistle. I looked up to see James holding out a pair of my skimpiest black lace underwear.

"Preparing for our honeymoon already?" One of his eyebrows raised questionably as his eyes mocked me with laughter. Then suddenly he was rolling on the bed laughing hysterically at some invisible tickling force. "AH.. HAHAHAHAHA... LILY! MAKE IT STOP!"

I didn't remove the tickle charm for twenty minutes.

* * *

><p>"Wow!" I gasped as my eyelids creeped back, letting startling hot sun brun by emerald green eyes. James passed me a pair of sunglasses and I slid them over my eyes.<p>

We had just arrived a couple of miles outside of Cannes France. The deep breath I took, as I gazed out at the clear blue Mediterranean Sea, brought the taste of salt to my tongue. The beach in front of us was layered with beautiful white sand that seemed to sparkle in the hot sun. The breeze was delightfully cool and ruffled the bottom of my white skirt.

"That's where we are going to be staying," James voice came from somewhere to my right and carried off into the wind.

I spun around to see a cute little cottage nestled just off the sand of the beech. There were bright green palm trees shading the brick cottage, their branches swaying in the breeze. The cottage was one story with big white windows and a huge porch that wrapped around the sides of the house and (I could only assume) out around the back. There was a little garden out front filled with vibrantly colored flowers, all dancing in the warm breeze. Two of the palm trees that stood in front of the house were connected by a woven hammock.

"You coming or not?" James laughed as he waved his wand and levitated our trunks up in front of him, beginning to walk towards the summer cottage.

I giggled, spun on my heels, and, with a little skip to my step, followed James.

* * *

><p>"Not fair!" I yelped, hopping up and down on one foot. The volley-ball we had been playing with had just handed on my right foot, successfully squashing three of my toes. We had been at the Potters' vacation cottage for three days now. I was comfortably fitting into the routine of sleeping in, playing in the warm clear Mediterranean waters and lounging in the warm sand during the afternoons and cuddling up near a campfire in the evenings.<p>

James laughed as he crouched under the playing net to come investigate my injury. "How is it my fault that you suck at volley-ball?"

I let myself plop down into the warm white sand, cradling my right foot. "I told you that I'm not good with any game or sport that involves any sort of ball," I glared at him, although the effect was probably lost as I was wearing my dark sunglasses.

James let himself drop down beside me, lounging back into the sand. "I thought you were just being modest about the sports thing," He mumbled as he reached out for my foot. "Let me see the damage,"

I stuck my tongue out as I extended my right leg out towards him. His hand gently grasped my leg behind my ankle and he pulled my toes up to survey the damage.

"Probably just a few broken bones," James said, pulling his wand out of the pocket of his swim trunks.

"Just a few broken bones..." I scoffed. My toes were throbbing but it wasn't as if I was dying of pain. I had had broken toes before. Mostly from tripping over things or stubbing my feet against chairs or walls or tables... or anything stationary. I sighed at my inability to avoid injuring myself. I was probably the most clumsy person on the planet.

"_Episky!_" James pointed his wand at my toes as he muttered the healing spell.

I could feel the pain in my toes ebbing away.

"Better?" James asked as he shoved his wand back into his pocket.

I wiggled my toes at him. "Much!"

James placed my foot back down into the sand and dropped down onto his back, stretching his legs out behind him.

I followed his lead, kicking my feet out and burying my newly-healed toes into the warm sand. I stared up into the perfect blue sky and couldn't spot a single cloud. I loved the feeling of the hot sun beating down onto my skin. It was quite refreshing after being under England's nearly constant cloud cover.

I turned my head sideways to look at James. His face was titled up towards the sun, his arms folded around the back of his head. His new tan accentuated his chest and stomach muscles. Muscles that were most likely a result of seven years of playing for the Gryffindor Quidditch team.

_ 'Wait! Why was I thinking about James' abs?' _I thought furiously to myself.

_ 'Obviously because they are extremely nice! They make him look even more attractive.' _The little traitorous thought-bubble in my brain responded.

_ 'What? I am not thinking about James like that! He is a friend. Just a friend.' _I thought back.

_ 'Five months ago you were enemies. Now you are friends. You know he has wanted to be more than friends for years.' _Darn that little thought-bubble!

_ 'More than friends?'_

"Want to play a game?" James asked me, startling me out of conversation I had been having with myself in my mind. I rolled onto my stomach, propping myself up on my arms, and turned to look at James.

"What game?" I asked suspiciously, eyeing the volley-ball. "It better not involve balls or coordination." My face flushed as soon as the words slipped out of my mouth. _Why did that sound so dirty?_

James laughed. "No balls or coordination required." His eyebrows raised teasingly.

Alright. I'd bite. "What game then?"

James raised his sunglasses so I could get the full effect of him wiggling his eyebrows up and down at me. "Sand Castles!" He cheered.

"Sand castles?" I snorted. _How old was he?_ "Like with buckets and shovels? Like what two year olds do?" I was laughing.

But James was shaking his head. "Not with buckets and shovels. With magic of course!" He was already clambering to his feet, wand in hand.

Now I was intrigued. "How do you play?" I asked, scrambling to get up myself. I glanced around the deserted beach as if I would find muggles walking about, laughing at the two teenagers standing in the stand each holding wooden sticks.

James was now standing with his legs spread, his arms held out perpendicular to the sandy ground, his wand in his right hand. "Sirius and I invented the game during our first trip here," He said. "It's a competition to see who can re-arrange the sand the fastest into a certain person, creature or object."

I was extremely thankful that I was top student in charms. "Alright," I said, feeling fairly confident that I would be able to do this game without hurting myself. "How do we know we have to make?"

James pulled a pack of cards out of his pocket. "They are charmed to reveal a picture when you flip the card over," He explained as confusion that clouded my face.

James split the deck in two and handed me half. "We flip the first card on the count of three, okay?"

I nodded, grasping my wand in my left hand and my first card, face down, in my right.

"Ready?" James asked me, holding his own card ready. I nodded. "One. Two. THREE!"

I flipped my card over to see a picture of a house elf. I smiled. Picturing the red and white dressed elves I had met at the Potter Mansion I raised my wand and muttered "_Defodio."_

Deep gouges began to appear in the sand. I moved my wand, tracing the outline of the house elf's body. Then I began adding in the details in the layering of the elf's ears, facial features and finally a little christmas sweater.

With a final flick of my wand I yelled "DONE!"

"What? Already?" James asked as he trotted over to look at my sand sculpture

I stood back, admiring my handiwork. "Yes already,"

I looked down at the little three-dimensional elf laying in the sand. It's little nose stood up like a spike, the sand delicate enough that a small breeze caused several sand grains to slide down onto the elf's face.

"That's amazing Lily!" James told me as he walked around the outside of my elf. "You really are the best person I know at charms,"

I shrugged. "I like charms,"

James chortled. "I'm not playing against you anymore. Totally unfair!"

I turned to investigate his elf. "Let me see yours then,"

"_Bombarda_!" James voice came from behind me. A small explosion occurred right over his sand-elf and by the time I had reached the sculpture, it was nothing more than a pile of seared sand.

"Why'd you do that?" I rounded on James, anger flickering in my eyes.

James shrugged. "You won,"

I glared.

"What?" James was walking very nonchalantly towards the hammock swaying in the breeze, just off the beach. "I didn't want to embarrass myself with my spotty charm work."

"Nonsense," I scolded. "I'm sure your charm work is satisfactory," I added following him off the beach and into the shade that was provided by the tall lawn trees.

James swung himself up into the massive hammock, folding his arms behind his head. "Satisfactory huh?" He laughed. "Says the girl who has received _Outstanding_ on every test since first year,"

I flushed slightly but stood my ground. "I worked hard for those _Outstandings_! Just because I'm muggleborn doesn't mean..."

"That's not what I meant at all!" James explained, propping himself up so he could see me better over the weaves of the hammock. "Of course you can receive _Outstanding_ on everything! You work so hard at it! It has nothing to do with being muggleborn at all!"

But I shook my head sadly. "Being muggleborn has everything to do with it. My parents were murdered because I am muggleborn," I sniffed.

James' eyes shifted understandably and held out his arms, inviting me into the hammock with him.

I stepped forward and slid into the hammock beside him. His arms came around me as I ducked my head under his chin. "I'm not going to cry," I told him bravely. I refuse to cry with him again.

James rubbed my back as he looked up at the palm leaves dancing in the wind over our heads. The hammock swayed lightly in the breeze. "You excited to be starting our last term at Hogwarts?"

I was grateful for his natural ability to sense my need for a change in subject. "Sort of. I'm excited to be finished but at the same time I will miss Hogwarts. It's been my home for the past seven years," I pushed away the thought of not having a home to go back to once I finished school. "What do you want to do when you graduate?" My attempt at keeping up conversation.

"I've applied to the Ministry of Defense. I want to be an Auror," James replied. The usual light and joking tone was gone from his voice.

I nodded. Most of the students at Hogwarts were now considering careers in fields that helped fight against the rising threat that was Voldemort.

"You?"

I really hadn't decided. Part of me wanted to be an Auror as well and to fight to avenge the deaths of my parents. Another part of me, a strong part, wanted to be a Healer. I had wanted to be a Healer since first year when I went to the matron in the Hospital Wing with a broken arm. I was amazed at how a broken bone could be healed in a matter of hours instead of weeks.

"I'm not sure yet. Maybe an Auror or a Healer," I replied finally. "I've always wanted to be a Healer but now I feel as if they need as many Aurors as possible,"

James was quiet for a few minutes, thinking. "I think you would be a better Healer than an Auror," He finally replied.

"Why's that?" I asked, turning my face up so I could see his. "I've got the OWLS and I know I'll have the NEWTS to be accepted as an Auror,"

James response was guarded. "I know that you _could_ be an Auror. I just think you'd make a better Healer. Besides you are too clumsy to be an Auror. You would trip and fall during an ambush or something." He attempted a laugh.

"Oh ha ha," I responded although I didn't really think that it was that funny. Being clumsy and uncoordinated was just a way of life for me. "But seriously, _why? _Tell me._" _I pleaded. And as James opened his mouth to respond I added, "I mean S-E-R-I-O-U-S. Not S-I-R-I-U-S!" I had known the Marauders long enough to know that Sirius-Serious jokes were the be-all of comical responses.

The corners of his mouth quirked as he raised his hand to lift his sunglasses up onto the top of his head, exposing his warm eyes. As he blinked down at me, I noticed how his eyelashes were long enough to touch the tops of his cheeks. "I couldn't bear the thought of you being an Auror. I'd being worrying about you all the time. At least at St. Mungos you would be away from the fight."

His response startled me. Whatever I had been expecting, it wasn't that. I had thought he had long ago gotten over his obsessive crush on me. Then again, now that we were friends perhaps this feeling was normal. But, somehow, I doubted he felt the same way about Sirius or Remus becoming Aurors.

Without much of a response, I decided I was safer off to counter. "What if I couldn't bear the thought of _you_ being an Auror?" I asked him, looking up to see his eyebrows crinkle in disbelief.

"Really?" He asked me, being this new serious James that I still wasn't used to. "Do you feel that way?"

I sighed. "No, not really." I turned my head to look back up into the green canopy of trees swaying above our heads. I felt warm and sleepy cuddling in his arms. Is this how it was suppose to feel with someone who was just a friend?

Somehow I SIRIUSLY doubted it.

* * *

><p>"Hurry up Lily!" James shouted, running towards the sea. His feet were already buried in the sparkling blue waters of the Mediterranean as he trudged forwards out into the open waters.<p>

"I'm coming! Geez! I can't run as fast as you!" I shouted back, jogging at a careful pace so as to not let my feet become buried in the sand effectively tripping me.

"You're slower than a flobberworm!" James laughed, now waist deep in the warm sea waters.

I scowled. It wasn't my fault that I wasn't made for speedy maneuvers.

"Got your mask and snorkel?" James was fitting his own set onto his face.

I nodded, pulling the swimming mask over my face and shoving the snorkel into my mouth.

"Wedi?" James asked, his mouth attempting to form words around the snorkel that was lodged in his mouth.

I settled for nodding and then dropped myself down into the water. I let myself relax using the salt water's natural buoyancy to help me stay afloat. James was somewhere to my left; I could feel the water rippling as he used his feet to propel himself forward. I reached out for his hand, lacing my fingers through his.

The beauty of the sea swelled around us as we gazed upon the colorful coral and tropical fish below. At one point James squeezed my hand in his and pointed down into a garden of seaweed. I could make out the outline of a mermaid, her tail a murky green color. I had never seen a mermaid before that wasn't in a textbook.

We floated like that, face down in the water, holding hands all afternoon.

Sometime close to dinner we made our way back to the cottage. I slipped out of my bikini and into a pair of worn jean shorts and a baggy sweater. I ran a brush through my tangled locks, feeling the grit of the salt in my hair. I would wash it out later.

As I joined James' family out on the deck I realized that it was no longer just the four of us at the Potter cottage.

"Evans!" A shrill voice screeched before my face was obscured by a man's bare chest.

I pushed at the chest trying to get away. "Ew! Sirius! Get off me!"

Sirius pulled back, his white teeth bared in a huge grin. "But I missed my favorite short red-headed Head Girl!" He exclaimed pulling me back into another bear-huge.

I pushed at him feebly. "I'm the only short red-headed Head Girl," I smiled as I finally got free.

At the patio table I could see Remus and Peter already seated in front of their plates. "Hey Remus, Pete," I said nodding politely to each.

Remus was smiling at me. "How you holding up with James?"

"Surviving," I responded, taking my place at the table as well.

"Hey!" James said, pretending to look offended. He plopped down into the chair next to mine.

I looked around at the three new Marauders. "What are you guys doing here?"

"The wedding was over and we really missed James," Sirius responded sappily as he tied his napkin around his neck.

"You lie," Elizabeth responded, stepping out from the kitchen. She had a huge plate filled with burgers. "You only came here for the food,"

Sirius nabbed a hamburger off the plate, folded it in half and shoved it into his mouth. "Alwight, you 'aught 'e!" I could see the meat rolling around in his mouth as he tried to talk.

"Ew, that's disgusting Sirius! Chew with your mouth closed!" Elizabeth whacked him upside the head, a disbelieving smile on her face. "Haven't I taught you any manners?"

Sirius took one big gulp, his Adam's apple bobbing in his attempt to swallow. " 'Orry Lizzy!" He grabbed the plate of hamburgers and held them out to me. "You 'ant one?"

Everyone laughed as I took one and added it to my hamburger bun.

"So how has your holiday been?" I asked politely to new Marauders as I squeezed some mustard onto my hamburger.

Remus, being only one without a mouthful of food, responded first. "It's been pretty enjoyable. Sirius has been staying at my place since James wanted to be alone with... I mean, since Sirius always spends the holidays with James and I was going to be alone," I could see James shooting daggers at Remus out of the corner of my eye.

I nodded knowingly at Remus. He had lost his parents last year just like I had lost mine this year. Voldemort had murdered his parents because they had refused to join his ranks as Death Eaters.

Suddenly I realized Remus was still talking and drew my attention back to him. "... and Sirius was sick and tired of the cold so we owled Pete and took a portkey here."

"I missed coming to your cottage James! Don't not invite us again!" Peter pleaded, brushing a fly-away strand of dull brown hair away from his eyes.

James laughed as he helped himself to a second hamburger. "I won't! Promise!"

It was interesting to see the Marauders away from school. They were still funny and mischievous but in this private setting I could really see how the four boys acted more like brothers than simple classmates. They were close, closer than I had ever been with ever of my girlfriends. They were such an odd combination too: James was athletic and outspoken, Sirius was always-joking but loyal, Remus was quiet but clever, and Peter was funny but mousy. Somehow the combination worked and I longed to be a part of their tight-knit make-shift family.

I smiled up at James. "Are we still going to have that bonfire after dinner?" I threw a smirk at Remus knowingly. "I know Remus loves chocolate so we should make S'mores,"

Sirius bounced in his seat. "What are _some-ores_?" He asked.

Throwing him an exasperated look I replied, "Not _some-ores_! _S'mores!_ Honestly! Didn't you ever take Muggle Studies?"

Sirius shook his head. "Of course not, my parents would never let me!"

_Right_. I forgot. The Blacks were muggle haters. I was so thankfully that Sirius was a black sheep.

I turned to look at Remus and Peter for help.

Peter looked just as clueless as Sirius but Remus responded helpfully. "They are like sweet sandwiches."

"Sweets?" Sirius was bouncing up and down excitedly in his seat.

James shook his head shamefully. "Grow up Sirius!" Everyone was laughing. Elizabeth and Henry took the lapse in the conversation to bring the leftover food back into the kitchen.

As the laughter died down, Sirius' curiosity increased. "So what are they? The S'mores?"

I turned to look at James and found him winking at me. He turned to back to Sirius who was looking more and more confused by the minute.

"You'll find out!"

* * *

><p>"These are the best sweets ever!"<p>

It was a few hours later and finally dark. We were sitting around the little fire James and I had built, roasting marshmallows on sticks. The fire pit was dug out from the sand on the beach. James and I had walked along the beach scrounging up enough wooden sticks and logs to get the fire going.

"Told you they were good! Muggles can invent some pretty tasty treats," I replied, as James passed me another roasted marshmallow. I squeezed it between two graham crackers and a piece of chocolate. Then I passed the completed sandwich to Remus. I was pretty sure it was his twelfth one but who was counting?

"Mmm! They are the best! Especially the chocolate!" Remus sighed I he took at bite of his S'more. I laughed at the irony of the situation. Him being a werewolf but loving something as simple as chocolate further solidified my belief that werewolves weren't at all bad. I had figured out early on, probably my second year, that Remus Lupin was a werewolf. I had kept it to myself but had been slightly fearful of him since.

It wasn't until this year I learned that the Marauders all knew of Remus' condition and that Remus himself talked to me about it and I had learned how misunderstood werewolves really were. I felt guilty thinking about the way I had acted towards Remus in the past. But looking at him now, smiling with a mouthful of chocolate, I felt that we were on our way to becoming good friends. I would, after all, be able to make it up to him the rest of this year as we frequently worked together since he was a Prefect.

I looked up at the four boys sitting around the fire. The warm red and orange light danced across each boys' face as the flames flickered in the evening breeze. I could see Peter's round face smiling as he watched Sirius attempt to balance a s'more on his the tip of his nose. I could see Remus, his eyes sparkling in the firelight, licking his lips as he finished his twelfth s'more. I could see James lipped curled upwards in a relaxed smile.

Most importantly I could see James' eyes watching my own. My own eyes crinkled as I returned the smile, thinking about how different this term at Hogwarts would be now that James and I were officially friends.

"Alright love?" He asked me quietly so no one else would hear.

I smiled at him and responded confidently, "Yes. I'm great," And I really was.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **I'm sorry this chapter was 5 days late getting posted! I have no excuse other than that I've been so busy with work. Which is pathetic but I apologize!

Anyways, Chapter 2 complete! I know most people are used to reading about Lily and James at Hogwarts only. This little vacation chapter was just to bring a little life back to Lily before returning to Hogwarts.

In Chapter 3 we will (finally) be returning to Hogwarts! And we will be staying at Hogwarts for 8 chapters in total before graduation. Yay!

**Thank you again for all the reviews! I really love reading everyone's opinion!**

This story has 14 more chapters to come. Please R&R to let me know if you like it and if you want me to post more!


	4. Chapter 3: Half the Night

**Summary: **It was only then that Slughorn came in, inquiring to why his floor was covered in blood, why two of his students no longer had wands, and why one of his students didn't have a voice at all. _Ooops! Guess I forgot to remove the silencing charm!_

This story takes places in the 2nd half of the Marauder's last year of school & continues until just before Lily & James' death. It will be written in entirely Lily's point of view. Rating will be changed to M for later chapters.

**Disclaimer: **This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

* * *

><p><strong>"Patio Lanterns"<strong>

_By: Jennifer Cole_

– **Chapter 3: Half the Night –**

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><p>"LILY! WE ARE GOING TO BE LATE!" A distant voice was shouting rudely and interrupting my sleep. I pulled my pillow over my head in an attempt to block out the incessant shouting. It didn't help much because I could still hear my bedroom door fly open and hit the wall behind it with a loud thud.<p>

"Lily! Didn't you hear me? We have to be in Potions in fifteen minutes!" Now that annoying voice had hands and those hands were shaking me. _Didn't my shaker know that it was sleeping time?_

I attempted to burry further into my blankets, groaning "Go away. I'm trying to sleep!"

Suddenly my warm blankets were gone, my pillow had been snatched away, and I was left blinking against the onslaught on light that was now attempting to burn my pupils.

"I'm serious Lily! Fifteen minutes! I know Slughorn likes you and all but he's still head of Slytherin house and won't hesitate to give us both detention if we are late!"

Blinking quickly and trying to make my eyes adjust to the light faster, I could finally put the voice of my awakener to the face of James Potter. His black hair was, as usual, sticking up all over his head. His eyes were looking at me worriedly through his crooked glasses. His robes were done up all wrong and one sleeve looked like it was longer than the other. The red and gold tie around his neck hadn't been tied yet either.

"Why do you look like the giant squid ate you for breakfast and then spit you out after it found out how nasty you taste?" I glared at him, pulling my sheets back up in an attempt to lull myself back to sleep.

The sheets were ripped forcefully out of my hands and James gripped my shoulders with his hands. "We forgot to set the alarm! We have class in fifteen minutes. You are the Head Girl. I am the Head Boy. We are going to miss class if you don't get up!" He shook me lightly as he spoke to me... in a rather unnecessary slow and emphasizing way. I was sleepy not stupid.

"Why didn't you wake me up earlier?" I screeched as I leaped out of bed and ran to my wardrobe to pull out a pair of robes.

"I forgot to set my alarm as well," James responded as I reached up to grab a hanger and pull my school uniform out of the wardrobe. "Uh Lily... your top is ah..."

I bounced back down to flat feet, pulling my pajamas (aka James' Quidditch jersey) down as it had rode up to reveal my black panties. "Get out! I'm changing!" My glare was enough to send James running for the door. "And fix your uniform! You look ridiculous!"

As soon as James was out of my room I hurriedly pulled the jersey over my head and threw on my uniform blouse. I hopped up and down as I slid a stocking onto each foot and then I wiggled as I pulled my skirt up to my hips. I pulled the black uniform vest down over my blouse and then shrugged into my robes. I quickly tied my hair into a pony tail and slipping my feet into my black shoes I grabbed my school bag off the chair beside my door.

"Are you ready James?" I yelled as I barreled into our shared Head Common Room. I couldn't believe I was going to be late for my first day of my last term at Hogwarts ever.

James was waiting by the door for me looking much more presentable. "Yes! Now hurry! I know a shortcut down to the dungeons!"

My eyebrows rose suspiciously and as I followed him out the portrait hole I couldn't help but muttering, "Why am I not surprised?"

As James and I hurried down the hall to Potions I felt my something shift in my bag unbalancing me as I ran. I followed James around a corner and stupidly looked down into my bag to see what had shifted. I didn't even get a chance to lift the cover off my bag before I felt something hard slam into me and felt myself tumble to the floor. I looked up and found myself gazing up at a seventh year Slytherin, Adrian Nott. Nott did not look too pleased at the outcome of our collison. He had ink spilled all down his robes. "Watch yourself Mudblood, otherwise Voldemort might just have to finish off the rest of your family... although there isn't much of your family left now is there?" His eyes were cold and his smile cruel.

"Detention for you, Nott!" I yelled at the boy who just looked on smugly. _I would not let him get to me._ James was back at my side helping my to my feet and we took off again towards the potion classroom at a run. Thankfully James had not heard Nott's comment to me. I couldn't even begin to imagine his response if he had.

Upon entering the potions classroom I threw my books onto the desk, yanked out my wand and quills and attempted to burn holes into the chalkboard with my eyes, waiting desperately for class to start so I could get my mind off what Nott had said. Unfortunately class didn't start. Professor Slughorn was late. My mood was quickly turning sour.

To make matters even better, Sirius was trying to coax me into giving him the answers to our holiday homework... which he was just finishing now.

"Dearest friend Lily... who looks so beautiful and ravishing today... " Sirius cried dramatically, throwing an arm over my shoulder. I couldn't help the skeptical look in his eyes as he spotted my messy attempt at a hairstyle. "Do you happen to have the answer to question three?" He batted his lashes at me in what I assumed was an imitation of a girl flirting.

Thankfully James came to my rescue and brushed Sirius' hand away. "Shut up!" He hissed quietly. "Why don't you annoy someone else? Like Wormtail." He suggested.

"HEY! I've got my own to finish!" Peter looked up from his parchment, obviously still attempting to finish his homework too.

"Or Snivellus?" James said exasperatedly.

Snape looked up from his conversation with Lucius Malfoy. He glared at the Marauders, though he was quiet unsure who had issued his 'nickname'.

Obviously Sirius had decided that bothering Snape was more important than finishing his homework because he bounded over to where Snape was sitting and pulled the parchment away that Snape was writing on. Snape made a desperate attempt to get it back but Sirius snatched it away and stood on a desk. "DEAR MS. SEXY EVANS!" Sirius read at the top of his lungs. "Oooo! Lils! Someone has a secret admire!" He wiggled his eyebrows at me.

I refused to take the bait he was offering me. Severus and I had stopped being friends at the end of fifth year and had barely talked since. I would not be coming to his rescue.

"Dear Ms. Evans!" He repeated. "It is I! Sir StinkaLot! I am writing to you because I haven't showered in four months and I was wondering if you could show me how..." He paused here to let in some laughter. James was snorting into his hand and Peter already had tears of laughter in his eyes. Snape got to his feet and pulled his wand out.

"Give it here!" He shouted.

"No magic between classes!" James yelled, his Head Boy badge gleaming as he got to his feet, his snickering finished. So James was being Mr. Serious Head Boy now was he?

"I would also like to tell you how in love I am with you and how much I adore muggles and muggleborns!" Sirius bellowed dancing out of Snape's arm length to continue reading.

"Give that here Black!" Malfoy shouted at Sirius as he too pulled out his wand looking mutinous.

"No magic between classes!" I yelled standing up and pulling out my own wand.

"And I would also like to know if you would like to accompany to the Astronomy tower tonight so I can show you how much I love yo...!" But Sirius was cut off. In fact, he was quiet incapable of saying anything, as Snape had just sent a jinx in his direction. Sirius fell to the floor, the paper still clutched in his hand, blood squirting out of his nose like a fountain. Unable to breathe, he spluttered and coughed.

"_Expelliarmus!_" I yelled. The wands of Snape and Malfoy went flying into my out-stretched hand. "That is enough! I said no magic in between classes."

"Ah Evans." Malfoy pointed out."But it is class."

"_Silencio_." I pointed my wand at Malfoy and he was immediately silent. "Now... _Vulnera Sanentur!_" I waved my wand at Sirius who immediately stopped acting as a human blood fountain and began to gasp in great gulps of air. Unfortunately the counter-curse that I learned from Severus hadn't been entirely effective because Sirius was still covered in now-drying blood. I sighed. At least his nose had stopped bleeding. Remus was crouching on the ground next to Sirius with Peter behind looking quiet afraid.

I turned to Snape and Malfoy, who were both quiet uneasy now that they had no wands and that I had three.

"Give us our wands back!" Snape's voice was calm but demanding.

"No, I don't think so." I answered, shoving afore-mentioned wands into my pocket. "I'll keep them until Slughorn gets here, I think. We can't you have you two killing off classmates now can we?" I glared at the pair of Slytherins as I plopped back down into my seat.

Then a very Marauder-type of thought struck me. "Oh," I turned back to Malfoy and Snape. "A week of detentions for the both of you."

"That's not fair! You can't be biased just because we are Slytherins." Snape complained, his eyes glaring at Sirius and giving away the fact that he believed Sirius should be in detention too. Malfoy looked as though he wanted to add his opinion but when he moved his mouth no sound came out. _I love silencing charms!_

Sirius made a noise somewhere between a cough and a laugh.

"And you too Sirius." I added in trying to show how I was a fair an unbiased Head Girl.

"For what?" Sirius looked shocked. "They were the ones who cursed me!"

I fumbled for an appropriate answer. "For... provoking them." _Ha! Take that! Unbiased my ass._

Sirius groaned and, looking dejected, slumped back down into his seat.

It was only then that Slughorn came in inquiring as to why his floor was covered in blood, why two of his students no longer had wands, and why one of his students didn't have a voice at all.

_Ooops! _I thought. _Guess I forgot to remove the silencing charm!_

* * *

><p>"Ugh!" I complained loudly as I trudged after the Marauders. "Wait up guys! My legs aren't as long as yours!"<p>

It was at times like this I really missed my best friend Alice. She had graduated from Hogwarts last year and was now an Auror working at the ministry. We had been best friends since I started here in my first year, her in her second. She had been Head Girl last year and taught me everything I knew. She was now engaged to a fellow classmate of hers, Frank Longbottom, and they were due to be married this summer. I was to be the Maid of Honor in their wedding. I sighed dreamily remembering how romantic the pair had been throughout their years at Hogwarts together. I couldn't help but feel a small twinge of jealousy that I had never had quite the romantic outcome they had.

"Hurry up Lily! You are slower than a turtle!" James had stopped giving me time to catch up to him. I could see Sirius, Remus and Peter twenty feet down the hall. _How did they walk so fast?_

I groaned as I reached James, pressing my book bag into his hands. "If you expect me to keep up at least lighten my load will you?"

James slung my bag over his shoulder next to his. He winced dramatically. "How many books do you have in this thing?"

I glared at him as we started off in a walk again down the hall. "Only five. It's not that heavy." Okay, it was heavy for me but I knew it couldn't have been that bad for him. He was so much taller than I was and his robes couldn't his Quidditch muscles. I felt pitiful next to him with my short stature and skinny arms. "Where are the others off to anyways?" I asked James as we made our way down a staircase on the fourth floor.

James threw an exasperated look at me sideways. "To lunch. Where else?"

I chuckled. _Of course! Where else?_

I followed James into the Great Hall. James plopped down into an empty seat next to Sirius at our Gryffindor table. I carefully sat down next to James, trying to avoid the flying food as the four boys stuffed their faces.

Looking over the table I was grateful to see that the house elves had prepared a variety of soups for lunch. The castle was very drafty and cold in January and my robes just couldn't keep the chill out.

"Hey Lily," James asked me a while later, leaning back and patting his now full stomach.

"Hmm?" I responded, sipping another spoonful of my barley soup. It was so lovely and warm.

"Want to go to the library after class?" He asked me, completely out of character for him.

Sirius was pulling a face already and beat me to the obvious question. "Why on earth would you want to go to the library?"

James sheepishly pulled out a scroll of parchment from his bag. "Erm... I need help with Ancient Runes." He shrugged, cheeks slightly pinked.

I sighed. "Why did you even take Runes James? It's not like you need it to be an Auror."

James shrugged, shoving his parchment back into his bag. "Same reason you did. Because I thought it was interesting." He turned towards Sirius with a hand over his mouth, apparently in an attempt to block me from hearing what he was whispering to Sirius. It didn't work. "And because I knew you would be taking the class."

I rolled my eyes and drank another spoonful of soup. "I suppose we can go after charms." We had double charms that afternoon with the rest of the seventh year NEWTs. I think there were only about thirty of us left in NEWT level charms. It was by far my favorite class.

"Thanks Lily! Your the best!" Before I knew it, James' arms had enveloped me in a hug and had squeezed so hard that my spoonful of hot soup when tumbling down the back of his shirt.

"Ouch! HOT! HOT! HOT!" James jumped up shaking his shirt viciously in an attempt to cool his burning skin.

I laughed with the rest of the Marauders as James amusingly danced trying to avoid his scald robes from touching his back.

"SOoooo..." I said turning back around to face the remaining three Marauders. James' jig was getting rather repetitive. "What are you boys looking at doing after we graduate?"

Sirius was prepared and ready with an answer. "Auror. No question!"

I nodded figuring as much. You don't become a traitor to your own family for seven years while you are at school just to return to them afterwards. He truly was a Gryffindor through and through.

"What about you Pete?" I asked the smallest Marauder.

Peter looked up from his pie with clouded eyes. His answer was slower and pensive. "Not sure." The clouded look disappeared and his eyes turned back to that muddy brown I was used to seeing. "An Auror sounds cool but I don't know if I could get into the Ministry."

We all knew he had barely scraped enough OWLS to continue into the NEWT level courses for being an Auror. "Keep your head up Pete! I'm sure you can do it!" I smiled encouragingly at him, trying to be supportive.

Peter smiled back at me. "Thanks Lily," His eyes looked a little happier to me.

I turned to Remus. Poor boy. He wouldn't be able to do much of anything once he graduated. Being a werewolf had a certain stigma that still hadn't been overcome in everyday wizarding society. Of course, none of the Marauders knew that I knew that Remus was a werewolf. So I had to ask the poor boy the same question as I had asked the rest.

"So Remus... Auror for you as well then?" I smiled at him warmly, trying to not let my eyes betray me.

The skeptical look in Remus' eyes was not lost on me. Poor boy.

"Yes an Auror is my goal. But I've also thought that teaching would be really worthwhile as well." Remus' voice sounded dreamy as if his thoughts were nothing but a dream. Sadly enough, they probably were.

"I think you would be an excellent Professor Remus! You are really good at Defense!" I put my hand next to my mouth to direct my voice towards him. "You'd probably be much better than our current defense professor. I bet you wouldn't get nearly as many pointless essays." I smirked at him.

Remus smiled, his eyes crinkling as the corners of his mouth folded upwards. "Yes I'd be all about practicals. Merlin knows we need it."

I nodded in agreement.

"I'm so tired of Lepton's essays." James complained, finally sitting back down at the table. I could see him replacing his wand in his pocket so I assumed he had used an extinguishing charm or something. "I really wish we would just practice every class. With Voldemort out there, we need all the practice we can get!"

Everyone nodded in agreement. I understood the importance of his statement more than anyone else. I didn't want another dead family to deal with. I had already lost my family and would hate to see my friends go through the same thing.

_Wait! Did I just call the Marauders my friends?_ I thought about the holidays we had just spent together; the five of us laughing on the beach together, collecting firewood to roast marshmallows on, playing Sand Castles together, hexing Sirius when he charmed my bathing suite top to come loose while we were swimming...

"Hurry up Lily! We have to go to charms." James was tugging on the sleeve of my robe, encouraging me to get up from the table to follow the Marauders out of the Great Hall. "And remember we are going to the library right after so grab a sandwich for later, okay?"

I wrapped a turkey sandwich into my napkin, shoved it into my bag and got up from the table.

I let my gaze wander from Remus, whose weathered face smiled at me, to Peter, whose face turned slightly pink at the gaze of a girl, to Sirius, whose ice blue eyes sparkled with a warmth reserved just for his friends, to James who had his hand outstretched and waiting for me to grab it.

_Yes. My friends_.I grabbed James' hand and followed the Marauders to our charms lesson.

* * *

><p>It was only when nine pm rolled around that I finally checked my watch. "Oh my gosh! It's already nine o-clock. We've missed dinner!" I groaned.<p>

My turkey sandwich hadn't lasted me as long as I thought it would have. James and I have been holed up in a corner of the library since four o'clock, me attempting to explain our Ancient Runes assignment to him.

James grinned. "That's okay. I'll show where the kitchens are and we can get some food on the way back to the Common Room."

My eyes widened. "You actually know where the kitchens are?"

James nodded. "I know where lots of things are in this school."

I laughed. "I'm sure you do! After sneaking out every night the past two years on the full moon you ought to!" _Oh no! I wasn't suppose to know that! _I slapped my hand over my mouth and felt suddenly horrified.

James gaped at me. He obviously did not know that I knew his secret. "Wha.. how... When did you find out?" He squeaked.

My eyes were still huge as I slowly lowered my hand from my mouth. "I'm so so sorry! I didn't mean to say anything! I haven't told anyone! Honest!"

James glared at me. He obviously wasn't believing me.

"Oh." I realized he had asked me a question. I took a deep breath before I answered. "I found out last year in January. I already knew that Remus was a werewolf. I've known since second year. His symptoms were obvious. But I didn't think that you guys would... well when I saw the dog, rat, wolf and deer together I just sort of... knew." I whispered. "Please don't be mad!"

James didn't say anything for a bit. His eyes were no longer making contact with mine and I could tell he was thinking. I lowered my eyes to the table.

"It's a stag." He said finally.

I looked up at him. "Pardon?"

"I'm a Stag not a dear." He said in the same beaten tone.

I nodded, eyes still wide and to my surprise I felt tears forming in my eyes. "I'm so sorry James! I didn't mean... it's just... I haven't told anyone... please... James..." I felt like I had betrayed him somehow. And we had just started being friends...

James raised his eyes to me. "No, don't cry Lily. Sorry. It's my fault. I was just surprised you knew and..."

"No. If I hadn't been so nosy..." I cried, trying to focus on his face through my tears.

"No. It's okay. I trust you. You obviously haven't told anyone and I believe you won't tell anyone." James said sincerely. His eyes were warm again and I could feel myself drowning in hazel.

I hiccoughed and looked down at my notes. I was sniffing pathetically when I felt something wallop me in the head.

"What did you do that for?" I demanded searching for the object that had hit me. I spotted the culprit, a crumpled up piece of parchment, on the floor a few feet away.

"Shh!" James hushed. "I just figured a little knock to the head would make you feel better."

I glared at him.

James laughed. "I'm sorry. I was kidding. I won't let it happen again." He crossed his heart. "I promise." He reminded me of myself when I was a child, crossing my heart promising my parents I hadn't been the one to break their favorite vase... when in fact I had.

I giggled. "You look like a two year old when you cross your heart like that."

James laughed as he slammed his book shut. "So what do you say? Potatoes and turkey?" His words reminded my stomach how hungry it was and it gurgled loudly.

"No roast beef and carrots!" I grinned as I stuffed my books back into my bags.

"Ugh no. Toasted bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwiches with strawberry ice cream for dessert!" James said getting to his feet.

"Definitely!" And I followed James out of the library.

* * *

><p>The rest of the week passed fairly uneventfully. I was unsure whether or not James had told the Marauders that I knew their secret until the incident that happened on Friday afternoon.<p>

I had followed the boys out to the Quidditch pitch, as Gryffindors had training scheduled that afternoon. James was Quidditch captain and Sirius was a beater on the house team. Remus and Peter always went down to watch practices. This was the first time I found myself doing the same thing.

Bundled up in a winter parka, scarf, knit hat and the thickest pair of mittens I could find, I was huddled up on the stands sitting next to Remus and Peter. The icy January air seemed even cooler sitting that high up in the stands. Remus had cleverly brought his History of Magic essay to work on whilst the team was practicing. Peter was practicing the transfiguration homework we had been set (transfiguring paper into broomsticks). So far he had only managed an origami figure shaped like a broomstick.

I turned my attention back to where the Gryffindor team was already a red and gold blur on the pitch. They had obviously already started their practice. I could see Sirius with his beater's bat flying alongside the other Gryffindor beater, a burly fifth year named Cartell. I could easily spot James flying down the pitch with the red Quaffle tucked neatly under his right arm, his left hand steering his broomstick. He passed the Quaffle sideways to another one of our team's chasers (a fourth year girl whose surname I was pretty sure was Fennel). Quidditch had never really interested me much. Being sixty feet in the air with nothing but a stick of wood between me and the ground wasn't something I really fancied trying.

I let my eyes follow James as he whizzed around the pitch, soaring and diving and climbing. I watched as he organized his team to try different tactics. He would change positions from being Chaser, to Beater, to Keeper and even Seeker as he saw necessary. To my novice eyes he looked talented enough to play any part of the team. I could see why playing Chaser was his favorite position... they were the teammates that scored all the goals. The heros. Of course James would be a Chaser. It just fit with the "_I must save the day_" persona James had going on. Not that saving the day was a bad thing... it could just sometimes come off as cocky. Or arrogant. Or egotistical. Or any name I had previously called him during our past six years together at Hogwarts. It scared me a bit to realize that I was beginning to understand that there was a lot more to James than showing off with his mates.

"You coming down Lily? Practice is over." Remus was waiting for me at the end of the row of bleachers. I saw Peter a couple stairs down, already heading back down towards the pitch. My eyes darted to the empty Quidditch Pitch and as I turned back to Remus to follow him down to the change rooms I wondered how long I had been absentmindedly thinking.

"Ya, I'm coming." I followed Remus down the steps to the Quidditch change rooms. Remus and Peter walked through the door to the room and I hung back waiting outside the little building. I leaned back against the brick wall of the change room, my face turned up towards the sky. It was only three o'clock but the sky was already dark. The clouds swirled above threateningly, warning everyone that it was only a matter of time before snow began pelting the earth again.

"What are you doing out here?" Sirius had come back out from the change room. "I thought for sure you would have come in to at least see us all undressing." I ignored his wink.

"That's exactly why I'm out here." I quipped, wrinkling my nose at him. "I try to avoid nasty smelling half-naked boys as much as possible."

"So I'm nasty smelling?" Sirius asked, his eyebrows raised. "Or are you referring to our smelly friend James?"

I let out a laugh. "At least James doesn't smell like wet dog."

Sirius' mouth dropped open in shock. _Wet dog... Oops_! Wow. I was bad at keeping secrets.

Sirius' eyes narrowed. "When did you find out?"

I swallowed nervously. "Erm... a while ago? James already knows that I know. I wouldn't tell anyone. Honest! I think it's really brave what you all did for Remus." I stammered, fumbling over my words in a hurry to get it all out. I peaked carefully at Sirius' expression, trying to read what he thought of my knowing their secret.

Twenty seconds passed before the serious look in his eyes vanished to be replaced by that sparkling mischief I was used to seeing. "Well I guess the dog's out of the dog house now!" He winked at me again.

_Seriously did girls find the winking attractive? It seemed more creepy to me._ I wondered if Sirius had an eye problem...

"I figured you would find out someday... since you and James are going to be married and everything." Sirius quickly sidestepped my swinging arm (aka my pathetic attempt at hitting him) and ducked back into the change room.

"Sirius Black! You get back here!" I yelped, chasing after him into the boys change room. "Eep!"

I had just walked into a room filled with six scantily-clad very male Quidditch players. James had just been coming out of the showers when he saw me, dropping his towel in surprise. I spun around to face the door, my cheeks flaming hot and my eyes squeezed shut blocking out everything.

"I'm sorry! Sorry! Sorry Sorry! I didn't see anything!" My voice was three times higher than it normally was because I most definitely had seen something. A very naked James' something. A very naked James' large something... _Ahhh! _I put my face in my hands shook my head furiously trying to shake the image out of my brain.

There was a lot of laughter behind me. I could hear a locker door opening and the rustle of clothes. "Geez Prongs. I don't think Lily came in here to see you in your birthday suit!" Sirius' voice was filled with laughter.

"Shut it Padfoot!" James' voice was also tinged with laughter. "At least I don't streak in the Great Hall."

"Hey! You promised you wouldn't mention that bet again!" Sirius voice was indignant. "When I thought that bet up I never dreamed I would be the one to lose!"

"That was you?" Cartell's voice was filled with amusement. "Oh man. That was hilarious! McGonagall's face was priceless!"

Another round of boyish laughter ensued.

"Excuse me!" I yelled over their chortles. "Is everyone dressed now or in turning around am I risking becoming blind again?"

More laughter. "Your safe Lily." Remus' voice was a gift from Merlin.

"Thank you!" I said, taking a deep breath in an attempt to cool my red face. I touched my cheeks with my hands and when I didn't feel a burning heat I assumed my face had cooled enough to turn around.

I was greeted by a much more acceptable sight. Yes, four out of the six boys were still only dressed from the waist down but it was an improvement. James was still not wearing a shirt and was toweling his hair dry. Remus and Peter had sat down on one of the empty benches and were looking at Cartell's split beater's bat. Sirius was fully dressed and was rubbing what looked like wax on his Cleansweep.

Forgetting why I had followed Sirius into the change room in the first place, I dropped down next to Remus and Peter, holding my hand out for the broken bat. Peter passed it me as I pulled out my wand.

"Honestly! Doesn't anyone remember the repairing charm we learned in fourth year?" I muttered exacerbatedly. "_Reparo!"_ The crack in Cartell's bat seemed to grow together and disappear. I held out the bat to Cartell.

Cartell took the bat smiling at me. He was fairly short for a boy (well shorter than James and Sirius anyways) at 5'9" and was broad shouldered and had a thick neck. "Thanks Lily! I was worried that I would have to ask my folks for another one. That's the third one I've cracked this season. I will have to remember that spell."

"And pay more attention in charms." I told him, smirking.

Cartell sheepishly added his bat to his bag and then slung his bag over his shoulder. "I'll see you lot on Sunday for the big game then!"

"Definitely! We're gonna beat those Slytherins so hard that they'll be smushier than flobberworms!" I shook my head as Sirius slapped five with Cartell. Sirius' grammar really was pitiful.

Cartell left with the other team members leaving me alone with the four Marauders. I turned to face them wondering what was in store for me tonight. I had learned that being friends with the Marauders meant pranks, bets, drinking, games and (the one I was still refusing to give in to) breaking the rules.

"So boys... what's in store for us tonight?" I questioned, images of sitting quietly in the Common Room danced longingly through my mind.

James was looking apologetic. Peter was looking slightly guilty. Sirius had a huge smirk on his face. Remus looked a lot paler than he had yesterday...

"Erm. Tonight is the full moon so ummm..." Remus stammered. Apparently James and Sirius had filled the rest of them in on the fact that their secret was no longer privy to just the four of them.

"Oh right. Sure, no problem." I said, taking a few steps back and wondering what I would do all evening by myself. Being by myself was something I had gotten very good at avoiding these past few weeks. "I'll just umm... Go back to my Common Room then. You boys have fun." I pushed open the door to the change room and stepped out into the cold.

For some reason being left out of their nightly activities somewhat saddened me. I had just begun to feel like I was officially part of the club only to realize that I could never fully be a member. I sighed and began walking back up to the castle.

"Lily! Lily wait!" James voice was shouting from behind me.

I stopped in the snow and waited for him to catch up.

"Sorry you can't come with us." James told me, somehow completely understanding exactly what I was feeling. He looped his arm around me and started walking me back up to the castle. "Want me to nab you something from the kitchens before I go tonight?" I shook my head, thinking how I could get something myself now that I knew where the kitchens were.

"Promise me something?" I asked him a few minutes later as we reached our Head's Common Room. "_Manticore,"_ I muttered quickly giving the portrait our password. I stepped through the portrait hole and into our shared Common Room.

"Anything," James agreed as he followed me into the room, lingering by the door.

I looked down at the carpet pushing a piece of fluff around with my toe. "Be careful," I requested looking up into his eyes. How silly was my request? How many times had James gone out with a werewolf and he had been fine?

"Of course," James replied, his smile warming me. He wrapped his arms around me and squeezed me gently. I could feel my parka being squished against the pressure.

"I don't know what I would do if you didn't come back," I mumbled into his chest, being completely sincere.

James pulled back and held me out at arms length. The corners of his lips were turned up in laughter as though he was mocking me. But his eyes were serious and bore into my own. "We've done this a hundred times. No worries. I'll be back! I promise." He told me, something else glinting in the corner of his hazel eyes.

I blinked and the look was gone. I smiled up at him and attempting to break the serious mood replied, "You better because I won't be able to ward off all of your crazy fans when you can't come to the Quidditch match on Sunday."

James sighed dramatically. "Oh yes. Wouldn't want to disappoint my fans! What would I do without them!" He feigned a stab wound to the heart.

I laughed in response and pushed him towards the portrait hole. "Be safe but have fun!" I told him. "Go be all deerish!"

James rolled his eyes. "Stag." He reminded me. "I have antlers" He held his arms above his head to stimulate said antlers.

"Sure sure." I laughed, ushering him out.

James slipped through the portrait and I leaned out through it waving goodbye to him. "I want to see it someday." I called after him.

James turned back, winked and then rounded the corner and was gone.

I sighed and turned back into the Common Room. There was already a nice warm fire crackling in the hearth. I shed the parka and the rest of my winter gear and settled myself down into an armchair by the fire. I whistled and my kitten Danica trotted over and curled up at my feet, purring contently as the heat from the fire warmed her as well. I stroked her back, reveling in the feeling of her soft white fur.

Figuring now was as good a time as any, I pulled out my History of Magic essay. I glanced at the little note I had wrote at the top of my essay, reminding myself how long it had to be.

"Ugh! Four feet?" I groaned. Danica peeped an eye open to look at me, probably thinking I was crazy for talking to myself.

I sighed. It was going to be a long night.

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><p>I startled awake as I heard a loud bang. I jumped in the armchair I had been using as a bed. My completed History of Magic essay was strewn across my lap and Danica had disappeared off somewhere. I looked around for the indication of the time and by the way the coal embers in the fire were already black I figured it had to be sometime very early in the morning.<p>

I heard another bang and was now awake enough to realize that it was a door slamming. James' door. I folded up my essay and stored it back into my bag. I stumbled out of the armchair and up the half flight of stairs to the Head Boy's room. I could barely make out the word "James" inscribed in the gold plaque on the door and my hand fumbled around for the door handled.

"James? You okay?" I asked quietly as I opened the door to his bedroom. I took a step inside. The drapes had not been pulled around the windows so I could make out the bed from the soft dawn light coming from outside.

James figured was prone on the bed, his face buried in the blankets, his shoulders shaking.

"James what's wrong?" I asked, moving quickly to the bed. I pulled at his arms, trying to pull them away from his face and encourage him to sit up so I could talk to him.

James looked up from the bed, his body shaking with sobs. I sucked in a quick breath at the sight of his face. The light from the window made his tear-stained face shine. He had a small cut on his forehead but other than that he seemed unharmed.

"James." I asked, taking his hands in mine. "What happen?" My eyes searched his face waiting for his eyes to raise so I could see them.

James' breathing was fast and uneven. His body was still shaking with sobs.

I was panicking wondering if something had happened with Remus. I wondered if Sirius or Peter were hurt.

"James. Tell me!" I urged, squeezing his hands in mine.

I lost my breath as James eyes turned on mine. They were pitch black and angrier than I thought possible. The look was frightening and I dropped his hands in fear. My eyes were wide as I heard James say in a deep but steady voice,

"He is going to pay. I am going to make him feel the same pain." My mouth popped open into an O-shape but I couldn't make any words come out. James continued, "It's my parents. Voldemort murdered them."

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><p><strong>AN:** Chapter 3 complete! I hope everyone is glad to be back at Hogwarts! Sorry it took me so long to update! I started a new job and it's been hectic! I will try to get Chapter 4 up much quicker!

Sorry about the deaths... it had to happen. I know my story is slightly off canon (ie James' parents died of old age in the books but I had them murdered by Voldemort)... but I found some little tweaks just helped the story to flow better. I promise the next few chapters won't be so depressing!

Chapter 4 will be more exciting and happy. No more deaths (well for a while at least). We see our favorite characters at a party and everyone is in much better moods! Drunkenness, silliness and craziness will ensue! Stay tooned!

_**Thank you to everyone who reviewed Chapter 2! Your reviews inspire me to keep writing so thank you! Hope to hear everyone's opinions on this chapter too!**_

This story has 13 more chapters to come. Please R&R to let me know if you like it and if you want me to post more!


	5. Chapter 4: Drank a Lot

**Summary: **I buried my face into my hands wondering how on earth I had gotten to this point. We were just barely friends. Friends didn't think that way about each other. Nevertheless, it was official. I, like the rest of the female population at Hogwarts, desired the body of James Potter.

This story takes places in the 2nd half of the Marauder's last year of school & continues until just before Lily & James' death. It will be written in entirely Lily's point of view. Rating will be changed to M for later chapters.

**Disclaimer: **This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

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><p><strong>"Patio Lanterns"<strong>

_By: Jennifer Cole_

– **Chapter 4: Drank a Lot –**

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><p>The light coming in the bedroom window was now a misty blue color. It had to be nearing breakfast time. This meant that I had been sitting here on James bed, James tucked into my chest with my arms wrapped around him rubbing his back, for the past three or four hours. It had just been within the last forty minutes that his shoulders had stopped shaking and his sobs had subsided.<p>

I felt an emptiness inside of me. I had only just met his parents three weeks ago and now the warm and smiling faces of Elizabeth and Henry were another scar in my memories. As I held James close I could only be grateful that he had put me back together enough to now be the strong one to comfort him. I felt as if the pair of us were like my late mother's favorite green vase; broken into pieces and then glued back together. But even after being glued together there were always still going to be cracks visible.

I looked down at James. He had his eyes closed, his long lashes resting against his tear-stained cheeks. His breaths were even and deep now and I knew he had finally fallen asleep. I hummed lightly as I stroked his hair.

_"I came to you in dark despair,_

_I needed someone who would care._

_You held me close against your heart,_

_I felt a warmth right from the start._

_Then one day he took you away."_

James was still in my arms, but I could see that his eyes were open. I smiled at him gently and turned my face back towards the window to continue singing.

"_Why did it happen?_

_Who can say?_

_Now all that there is left for me is just a precious memory._

_You take the joy, you take the sorrow._

_You're here today and gone tomorrow."_

James was shifting in my arms as I whispered the last line of the song. I let my arms go slack and James sat up. His cheeks were flushed and tear stained. His clothes were messy and extremely dirty. The cut on his forehead was caked with dried blood. But his eyes were dry.

"James, I'm so sorry." I whispered meeting his blank gaze with my own.

"So am I." James whispered back, leaning forward so that his forehead touched mine.

He sighed deeply as he let his head rest against mine, our noses mere inches apart. I could see his eyes dart back and forth between the ground and my lips. Instinctively my tongue slid out to wet my lips. I could see the decision in his eyes before his mind had determined that he was going to do it. My mind panicking trying to decide whether I should stay put and let him kiss me or if I should pull away. My breath hitched as I realized it was too late to decide. James' lips were an inch from mine. I squeezed my eyes shut.

_RAP! TAP! TAP!_

I jumped backwards away from James, my eyes popping open and darting around furiously searching for the source of the sound. James had done the same and had spun around to face the window with his wand in hand. James took a slow breath and then lowered his wand.

I followed his line of sight to the window and spotted a beautiful fiery bird resting on the window sill. I knew instantly it was the Headmaster Dumbledore's phoenix Fawkes. I had seen him once before when I was called to the Headmaster's office to be given the news of my own parents' death.

I scooted down the bed and let my feet drop to the floor. I hurried across the room to open the window for the magnificent red feathered bird.

"Do you have something for us?" I asked the bird, cooing and scratching its head.

Fawkes gave a purr and held out one of his taloned feet. There was a letter addressed to James and I. As soon as I finished untying the letter Fawkes stretched it large golden tipped wings and took off into the dawn sky.

I turned back to James, the letter in my hands.

"What's that?" James asked, his voice hoarse from hours of crying.

I shrugged and made my way back over to the bed. I untied the knot and opened the tiny letter. "It's from Dumbledore." I said, my eyes immediately darting to the bottom. I held the letter out so James could read it too:

_Mr. James Potter,_

_ I am so very sorry to have given you such dreadful news at such an early hour. I hope that if you need anything you won't hesitate to call upon myself or any of the Hogwarts staff. The loss of Elizabeth and Henry Potter was one that has saddened many lives but have hope that they will always be remembered as long as you keep them in your heart._

_ I can only assume Miss Evans is with you now. I request that you attend my office at quarter past twelve this afternoon. Please bring Miss Evans with you._

_ My greatest condolences,_

_ Headmaster Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore._

I finished reading the letter and looked up to see if James had as well. His eyes were darting over the last sentences and when he stopped reading I folded the letter back up and pressed it into his hands.

"You okay?" I asked him after a few minutes of sitting in silence. My soft voice seemed harsh breaking the silence in the bedroom.

James looked up from the letter in his hands, his eyes still dry. "Not really, but I will be." He responded tucking the letter into his pocket.

"Go get a shower," I encouraged him. "The warm water will feel nice." I pointed towards our shared Head Bathroom.

Nodding, James got up from the bed and slowly made his way to the bathroom. I followed him quietly through the bathroom door. James stood idly by the sink, picking at the hemline on his sweater.

I moved over to the shower and started the water, testing it with my hand to make sure it wasn't too cold or too hot. Then I moved over to the towel rack and pulled a fresh towel loose from it, placing it on the edge of the counter near the shower. I glanced over at James to note that he still hadn't made any movements towards getting undressed.

The bathroom mirror was fogging slightly as I met James by the sink. He raised his eyes from the floor; they were bloodshot from hours of crying. I reached down to the bottom of his muddy sweater, grabbing the hem with my fingers and began tugging it up over his head. James obediently raised his arms in the air so I could pull it free and toss it onto the floor. Next I pulled his T-shirt free of his trousers, tugged it over his head and added it to his sweater on his floor. My fingers grazed along the firm contours of his chest muscles and I noted how he had only the littlest amount of chest hair dabbled between his pectorals. James was now bare-chested, his eyes distant and gazing somewhere over my head.

I squatted down to the floor, placed a hand behind his ankle and urged James to lift his foot so I could pull off his socks and shoes. James looked down at me and he raised his foot off the floor allowing me to ease his sneakers off each foot. His red eyes were burning into mine, a mysterious emotion lingering there that I couldn't place. His socks joined the growing pile of his clothes on the floor while his sneakers were tossed over near the bathroom door. I pushed on my knees to help myself stand back up, my eyes a foot lower than James'.

I hesitantly glanced down at James' the button on his trousers then back up into James' eyes. His normally hazel eyes were dark and his pupils were wide, despite the large amount of light that was coming through the frosted windows. The steam from the shower swirled around us and I remembered that I had been holding my breath. Sucking in a breath of air I moved my hands down to James' waist, moving slow enough that he had every chance to stop me. But he wasn't stopping me.

My hands reached the button at the front of his trousers and I slid my thumb underneath the waistband to provide pressure to pull the button free. I paused to give James a chance to push me away but, again, he made no movement to help or stop me. My cheeks flamed. I slid his fly down and raised my hands back up to his waist and began tugging the waist band of his trousers down his legs. When they were a puddle on the floor at his feet, James lifted each foot so I could pull the trousers free and add them to the clothes pile.

I stood back up and came face to face with James again. He was now standing wearing only his black boxer shorts, his eyes staring unfocused into my own. My breath hitched and I stumbled back a few paces, unsure about the look in his eyes. It was as if what he was seeing was a million miles away.

I fumbled around for my voice. "You'll be okay?" When James didn't respond I added, "I'll wait right outside the door."

At last James' eyes seemed to come into focus and the darkness in them melted away to reveal the hazel beneath. "Yes," He said pushing himself forward off the bathroom sink. "Thanks Lily," His hoarse voice was deep and layered with exhaustion.

I nodded and ducked out the bathroom door, closing it behind me. I heard the sound of the shower water beating off the porcelain base disappear as James stepped into the shower. I let out a big breath and slid down the door to sit at the bottom.

My cheeks were still hot and I knew my face must have been a brilliant shade of pink. After seeing James naked yesterday and undressing him today I knew one thing for certain; there was no longer a girl in Hogwarts who didn't desire his body. I buried my face into my hands wondering how on earth I had gotten to this point. We were just barely friends. Friends didn't think that way about each other.

Nevertheless, it was official. I, like the rest of the female population at Hogwarts, desired the body of James Potter.

* * *

><p>Forty-five minutes later I found myself face to face with the Phoenix statue at the entrance of Professor Dumbledore's office. The great bird's stone wings were open and curled around to form the entrance to the stairway.<p>

I turned sideways to glance at James, my hand tightly held in his. James was looking at the entrance with an unwavering gaze. To my left Sirius, Remus and Peter stood together. Remus had several scrapes on his face from his evening as a werewolf. He had dark circles under his eyes but at least the color had returned to his face. Peter looked a bit tired himself, probably from being up all night. Sirius looked the same as ever with the exception of his facial expression; his usual amused expression was gone to be replaced with a look of pure determination. I remembered how James had told me that Sirius had been living with him and his parents since the end of fifth year. I couldn't help but wonder if Sirius thought he had lost his parents too.

"Ahem," A voice rang from behind us. The five of us spun around to face Professor Dumbledore. The headmaster was dressed in dark blue robes, his white beard extending down past his neck. His eyes twinkled with a hopeful light as he held out a hand to James.

"Good evening Headmaster," James courteously greeted him as he dropped my hand to shake the Headmaster's.

Dumbledore seemed to contemplate James for several seconds before obviously deciding against saying anything to him. "Let's go up then shall we?" He strode forward towards the stone Phoenix entry and paused to say "_Patronus,"_ before continuing into his office. The stairway to his office began to move and spiral upwards with the Phoenix. I moved with James onto the moving stairway, Sirius, Remus and Peter following behind.

As we reached Dumbledore's office the stairway stopped moving. Dumbledore had already moved forward to sit at his desk. I followed the Marauders to the empty chairs in front of the Headmaster's desk. I sat down next to James, glancing sideways at him to silently ask him with my eyes if he was okay. James nodded slightly at me and then turned his attention to the Headmaster.

Dumbledore crossed his arms on his desk and looked at us over his half-moon glasses. "I brought you five here to talk about the future." He started confusing all of us. "I know you have all been through hardships these past few years, some of you experiencing more hardships than others." His eyes moved from me to James. "After watching you five over the past seven years, how you stand up for those who can't stand up for themselves, me and the other members have decided to invite you to join the fight."

My thoughts were jumbled in confusion. Surely by the fight he was referring to Voldemort. But what members? Weren't the Aurors responsible for fighting against Voldemort and his followers? What was he talking about?

"What members are you speaking about Sir?" James' voice was steady. I could see that spark back in his eye. That determination to make everything right.

Dumbledore smiled at us, his beard raising a half inch as his lips turned upwards. "I am speaking, of course, about the society I founded called the Order of the Phoenix."

So the rumors were true! Dumbledore had created a secret society to fight against the raising threat that was Voldemort. I saw this as both a good and a bad thing. Good that Dumbledore was trying to help in any way he could but bad that the situation with Voldemort had reached such a degree that Dumbledore no longer believed the Ministry could handle it. I swallowed nervously.

"I want to join," James said immediately, jumping to his feet. "I want to do anything I can to help prevent what happened to me and Lily from happening to other families."

Sirius was on his feet as well. "I'm joining as well." He shook his head and looked at James. "Together we will fight for everything your parents were."

James clasped Sirius' hand nodding his head. "Bet your ass we will." That lopsided smile graced his face and I felt my heart warm at the sight of it.

I stood up as well. "I want to join too, Professor. Anything that I can do to help I want to do!"

Dumbledore did not look at me sympathetically. His expression was proud. He turned to Remus and Peter. "Mr Lupin and Mr Pettigrew? Your thoughts?"

Remus glanced at James and Sirius and nodded his head once. "Of course, I'm in!" He stood up as well.

We all turned to look at Peter. He was still sitting in his chair, scuffing his shoes along the floor in thought.

"You do not have to join if you don't wish to," Dumbledore told Peter kindly. "It is a choice and no one will think less of you by not joining. There are many risks to being a member. We have lost members already."

The shoe scuffing stopped and Peter looked into the faces of his friends, determined. At last Peter stood up smiling at James, Sirius and Remus. "Let's do it." He said firmly.

Sirius thumped Peter on the back grinning at him. "Good on you mate!"

The five of us turned back to face Dumbledore who urged us to take our seats again. I sat down again feeling nervous but excited all at once. It felt amazing to know that I was going to be helping to prevent other people from experiencing the same loss I had experienced. The loss that James and many others had experienced. I silently vowed to myself that I would do whatever it took to stop Voldemort once and for all.

"You will not become full members until you graduate, of course." Dumbledore told us pushing his glasses back up his nose. "We will have you five come to an official meeting once school is over to initiate you. We will not be corresponding via letters or owls. Members of the order use Patronus charms only. Please practice and become competent in them before school is out."

The five of us nodded in agreement. We listened to Dumbledore explain a few more key points about things we should practice and read up on before he dismissed us from his office.

Taking James' hand again, the Marauders and I left the Headmaster's office our minds filled with thoughts about a somewhat brighter future. I couldn't help but feeling that each of us had grown up just a little since we had first entered his office.

* * *

><p>Since it was Saturday and we didn't have class the five of us headed down to the lake together, each of us bundled up in our winter outfits. Once again adorned in my puffy parka I sat beside James looking out over the Black Lake. Remus had brought along a small glass jar in which he had started a fire to keep us warm as we sat out in the snow. I reached forward to warm my hands on the orange flames. I could feel the heat through my green knit mittens.<p>

"Do you think it's gotten so serious out there that we need a group separate from the Ministry?" Peter asked, breaking the silence.

Sirius turned to Peter brushing his shaggy black hair out of his ice blue eyes. "I think the fact that Dumbledore created the Order of the Phoenix in the first place tells us just how much the Ministry isn't handling the threat." Being around Sirius when he wasn't being... well serious was starting to irk me a bit. I depended on his rude remarks and witty comments to keep the mood uplifting.

James shifted his gaze from the lake to join our conversation. "I'm fairly sure that Frank Longbottom is part of the Order. He was talking to me last year and accidentally mentioned something about a mission to Albania but he hadn't even started his Auror training yet." The icy wind kept catching James' messy hair, blowing it about in dark inky spikes.

Remus' brown eyes were barely visible as he spoke out from underneath his red hat. "I'm fairly sure Marlene McKinnon is a member as well. She was Head Girl here back when we were in first year."

James nodded and took a deep breath before responding, "My parents had told me that she has disappeared with her family... that they had gone into hiding cause they have two young daughters. But they must still be going on missions as needed because I remember seeing her husband at my house speaking with my dad this past summer. He had come to borrow a tent."

I felt so awful realizing how many families were being affected by Voldemort and his followers. To have to go into hiding with your small children... I couldn't even begin to imagine the terror. I would never want to bring up a child in a world that was so at war with itself.

I turned my attention back to what Remus was saying. "... definitely need to practice the Patronus charms together."

I nodded and joined the conversation. "I agree. I mean I know we learned them in Defense in fifth year but we never got the opportunity to actually practice them." Our Defense professor really was useless. All about the theory and very little practical.

"We definitely will have to have a go at them." James agreed.

"I wonder what other spells would be useful in The Order," I pondered out loud while rubbing my hands against my cheeks using the friction to warm them.

Thinking about the future, the five of us lapsed into silence again.

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><p>It was quite late when I found myself sitting at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall for dinner. In fact, the five of us had waited until dinner was almost over before we entered the almost empty Great Hall. The four long house tables were scattered with a maximum of twenty students, most of which were dawdling or absorbed in the homework they had been working on while they had ate. The emptiness and silence was a welcome thing for us as we sat with our minds full and our stomaches grumbling.<p>

I sat between James and Remus with Sirius and Peter on the opposite side of the bench. James helpfully began ladling some warm soup into my bowl before adding some to his own. Sirius was helping himself to some pie, completely skipping over the main course. Remus was sipping some hot chocolate, occasionally dipping a small piece of bread into the warm liquid chocolate. Peter was helping himself to a sandwich.

"We should probably work on our potions essays tonight," Remus suddenly spoke. I groaned. I had completely forgotten that we owed Slughorn a three foot paper on Veritaserum. NEWT level potions students were expected to prepare all sorts of advanced potions that might be needed in a position at the Ministry or as a Healer.

"Yes, let's work on it while we eat." I agreed, reaching down to my bag and pulling out an empty scroll of parchment. The boys followed suit, pulling out their parchment, quills and _Advanced Potion-making NEWT Level_ books.

"Question 1: List the ingredients of the Veritaserum potion," Sirius read aloud. As I swallowed another spoonful of soup I quickly began to jot down the ingredients for the potion: _Spine of Lionfish, Dragon blood..._

"Lily, what are the ingredients for Veritaserum?" James asked me sheepishly.

I rolled my eyes. I knew the four boys were only taking potions because it was a perquisite for being an Auror. I took it because it was just as interesting as charms. I found it fascinating. "Spine of Lionfish, dragon blood, Belladonna, Puffer-fish Eyes." I recited from memory. All four boys were quickly jotting down the list.

Sirius finished first and smiled at me. "Excellent! I knew we kept you around for a good reason Lily!" Another eye roll. "Question 2: How long does the potion take to make?"

I quickly wrote out another sentence explaining how the potion should take less than half an hour to complete from start to finish. I looked up at Sirius waiting for the next question. He was looking at me expectantly.

"So... how long does Veritaserum take?" Sirius asked me.

I grabbed at his potions book and pulled it towards me. I flipped through the pages until I found page 647: Veritaserum. "There you go. Now answer the questions yourself!" I told him chuckling.

All four boys immediately leaned forward to copy the answer out of the textbook. With a smile on my face I turned back to my own paper.

..._ the drinker will be forced to answer all questions truthfully regardless of its importance to being kept a secret. The serum lingers in the person's system for two hours before the person is able to lie again._

I looked up an hour later as I finished writing the last sentence of my three foot long paper. The Great Hall was completely empty save for us five. It had to be nearly eleven. Thankfully it was a Saturday and weekend curfew for us seventh years was midnight.

I looked across at Peter who was hopelessly copying down everything from the page word-for-word, his essay a good foot shorter than required. Sirius had ink of his nose and was looking very confused as his eyes skimmed the potions book. Remus was carefully writing about the legal implications of the potion, his writing neat and script-like. James was just finishing up and his eyes lifted to meet mine.

I smiled at him before a yawn caught up to me. I yawned hugely and rubbed my eyes. I remembered what a long day it had been. I was surprised James was holding himself so well. It had taken me a solid five weeks with his help to feel even remotely normal after the death of my parents. I could only imagine what joining the Order had meant to him. I was sure he had replaced his sorrow with a determination of revenge. Thinking about my dead parents, I couldn't help but agree with his thoughts.

"Ready to head up to bed Lily?" James asked me as he shoved his essay into his bag.

I nodded and another yawn escaped me. I stifled it with my hand trying to blink away the sleepiness. "Yes, I'm exhausted."

James clambered off the bench and waited for me to pack up my things as well. "Good luck finishing mates." James told his friends as we started off towards our Head Dormitory.

"Ya, night." I yawned as Remus waved me good night.

James grabbed my hand as we headed out into the entrance hall and I sleepily let him pull me back to our Dormitory on the sixth floor.

"I hate stairs," I grumbled as I tripped over another one, James' hand grabbing my sleeve and heaving me upright again.

"We're almost back," James chuckled as we finally reached the landing with our Portrait.

"_Manticore,"_ James told the portrait before pulling me into our Common Room. "Go dump your books and get ready for bed," James told me as he headed towards the stairs for his own bedroom.

I nodded and moved towards my room, dragging my feet slowly. I dropped my bag onto the chair just inside my door. I stumbled over to my wardrobe pulling my blouse and skirt off in the process. I left them strewn over the floor sloppily, too tired to care. I pulled out James' Quidditch jersey and tugged it over my head. Then I scrounged the thickest pair of socks I could find and pulled them on as well.

I could see the light coming from underneath the door of our shared bathroom. I knocked on the door quickly before I heard James say "Come in!" and pushed the door open. James was dressed in thick flannel pajama bottoms, wooly socks and was shirtless. He stood near the sink his toothbrush dangling out of his mouth.

I moved over to my sink and began brushing my teeth as well. Finishing up I ran my fingers through my tangled hair before splashing some water on my face. When I was completely done I looked up to see James idling by his bedroom door.

I didn't really know what to do so I muttered, "Good night then," before moving towards my own room.

"Wait," James voice echoed slightly in our huge marble bathroom.

I turned back to face him. His shoulder were slumped and his face looked tired. I could see purplish bags forming under his eyes. His black hair was even messier than usual (if possible) and his skin had goosebumps on it. "You okay?" I asked him, moving across the cold bathroom floor to stand with him near his bedroom door.

James was quite for a minute. I reached out my hands to rub his arms in an attempt to rid him of his goosebumps. His breath hitched as my icy hands touched his arms. I pulled them back hastily not realizing how cold I was as well.

"Stay with me?" He asked me, his voice low and layered with sorrow.

I nodded and followed him into his bedroom. James pulled back his red sheets and held them open for me to crawl in. James slid in after me, pulling his duvet up to swaddle us both with warmth. I signed as I felt my goosebumps disappear. I snuggled into one of his pillows, my back turned to him. "Night James," I muttered, feeling the edges of sleep all around me.

I felt the bed shift as James moved towards me. He slipped his arm around my waist and pulled me closer so that my back was pressed up against his chest. "Thank you Lily," And I could barely feel his breath on my neck as I felt sleep take me.

* * *

><p>"James you have to eat something!" I told him as we sat at the Gryffindor table the next morning. The roof of the Great Hall (which always accurately displayed the current weather conditions) was blue and sunny. Even though it was January and it would be cold, the sun would be a welcome change. James was already dressed in his Quidditch uniform (minus his knee plates and other gear that was kept in his locker in the change rooms down at the pitch) and was refusing to eat anything.<p>

"You 'af to eat somefing!" Sirius obviously didn't have the same pre-game nerves that James had and was stuffing his fifth pancake into his mouth. I grimaced away in disgust as syrup dripped down his chin.

"Sirius you are disgusting," I told him, my nose turned up at the sight of him. "I really have no idea what all those girls see in you." I pointedly looked across to the Hufflepuff table where there was a group of girls decked out in red and gold and dreamily staring at Sirius.

"Me either," Peter sighed, looking longingly at the Hufflepuffs as if hoping they would be daydreaming about him instead.

Sirius swallowed his pancake and downed a glass of orange juice before saying "I can't help it if I'm the best looking guy in the school and a firecracker in bed," He winked at a blonde hair sixth year Gryffindor as she walked by our little group. Her cheeks flushed and she hurried to join her friends at the end of the Gryffindor table.

I rolled my eyes and decided arguing with him was a lost cause. I refocused my energy on making James eat something. "Come on James! At least have a banana or something. You'll be out at the pitch all day and won't be back in until dinner! You need to eat something," I was peeling a banana for him as I spoke and then offered the fruit to him.

"No I don't want anything Li..." James started before I shoved said banana into his open mouth. James glared at me, his mouth a big O-shape around the banana but then finally gave in and began chewing the yellow fruit.

I smiled victoriously and began helping myself to some cereal.

I was just finishing my bowl when Professor McGonagall stood up from the Professor's table and announced that the Gryffindors and Slytherins on the house teams needed to head down to the pitch to get ready for the match. I glanced over at the Slytherin table and I could easily pick out Malfoy (who was a chaser himself on the Slytherin team), Nott (who was a beater) and Severus (who wasn't on the team at all). Malfoy was sitting with the rest of his team at his house table, a group of slaggy girls (well slaggy was my opinion) surrounding them. Malfoy caught my eye and glared, making a rude gesture with his hand at me.

I sighed and looked away. Animosity between the Gryffindors and Slytherins had reached a critical point as more and more Gryffindor families became victims of Voldemort's doings. Even Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws had begun to feel the impact of Voldemort's activities. According to the Gryffindors (and the majority of the Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws) the Slytherins were about as welcome at Hogwarts as fresh dragon dung.

James and Sirius were getting up now and preparing to head down to the pitch. This is the first time I could remember the Marauders not being swamped with girls before a Quidditch match. Perhaps it was the fact that I was sitting with them. Or perhaps it was the fact that everyone in the school knew that James' parents had been killed on friday. Or perhaps it was just that the Marauders were now more mature and didn't want a crowd of star-struck girls drooling over them.

"Sirius! We still get to walk you down to the pitch right?" A brunette girl from the Hufflepuff table screamed at him. Her crowd of friends stood behind her hopefully.

"Of course darling!" Sirius bellowed and slinging each arm around two of the girls began heading out into the Entrance Hall.

Ok, so maybe mature wasn't the right word.

James had hung back a bit, letting Sirius lead the way down to the pitch with his fanclub in tow. I turned around to wish him good luck and found myself pressed up against him, uncomfortably close. I felt my cheeks flame and hastily took a step backwards.

"Erm..." I stammered, wondering why I was acting like this. James was my _friend_. And I was most definitely not a star-struck girl drooling over him. I cleared my throat and started again, thanking the lucky stars when my voice came out normal. "Good luck at the match James! I know you guys will wallop those Slytherins." I stretched up on tiptoe so I could whisper in his ear. "Try to teach Malfoy a lesson for me,"

As I lowered myself back to the ground James gave me a quick wink and turned to leave. "I'll make you proud!" Be bellowed back at me. Then he turned the corner and was gone.

I sighed and dropped back down onto the bench. Remus and Peter were still eating their breakfasts so I figured I might as well have some warm tea before heading outside to the freezing Quidditch pitch.

"How was James last night?" Remus asked me when I was half way through drinking my tea. "We were worried about him, that he might do something irrational."

I giggled. "James being irrational?" Of course I was being sarcastic. James was extremely irrational and being so emotional meant he had an even greater tendency to overreact.

Remus chuckled his light brown hair dancing over his eyes as he shook with laughter.. "Right well... anything more irrational than normal?" He clarified with a smile.

I took another swallow of tea to give myself time to think. Remus was the rational one of the group. The calm one. The one that didn't make fun of me and took everything I said with utter seriousness. I knew that Remus would not make snide remarks about me and James sharing James' bed last night. That's why I liked him so much. Remus and I had a lot in common. I glanced at Peter to make sure he was occupied with his own breakfast before leaning forward to answer Remus in a near-whisper. "I stayed with him last night. I think he was afraid of being alone."

Remus nodded his eyes sad. "I thought as much,"

"Don't tell James I told you," I requested.

Remus nodded. "Of course not. James hates to appear to be weak."

I shook my head and looked down into my mug. "I don't really see it as a weakness." I took another sip of tea. "I see it as being there for a friend. He was there for me and I'm going to be here for him."

"Just friends?" Remus asked me, a twinkle in his eye.

I shoved him with my hand, not applying much pressure at all. "Sorry Sirius. I thought I was talking to Remus here." I rolled my eyes at him. "Come on! Let's head down to the frozen pitch to watch the boring sport that is Quidditch."

Remus just smiled.

* * *

><p>Two hours later I found myself in the Quidditch stands watching the very heated matched from behind a pair of binoculars.<p>

"The Chasers on both teams are good enough to keep the score very close. It look like it's going to be a simple matter of who catches the Snitch first." Remus was telling me as he looked through his own binoculars. "They seem fairly evenly opposed, wouldn't you agree?"

"A bit too enthusiastic aren't you Remus?" I responded as I followed James with my binoculars, praying that he would slow down so I could keep track of him easier.

"Are the games usually this close?" I asked, not removing my eyes from my binoculars.

Remus' voice came from my left. "Not usually. Usually James has his team up so many points by this time that even if Slytherin caught the snitch Gryffindor would still win."

"But Malfoy has two new chasers on his team this year." Peter was saying from my right. "They've never even played before so I don't know why they would want to join up now."

"Probably has something to do with the fact that Malfoy's family purchased their entire team brand new broomsticks... they fastest ones to date." Remus replied as I watched Sirius direct a bludger away from James' head.

I pulled my binoculars away from my eyes to look at Remus. "That seems like cheating don't you think?"

Remus shrugged, not taking his eyes of the pitch. "Oh look!" He pointed out at the pitch. "Both the Seekers are after the Snitch!"

I raised my binoculars again to follow the action of the match. The Gryffindor and Slytherin Seekers sped behind the tiny winged Snitch, elbowing and kicking each other out of the way trying to gain an advantage. Suddenly a bludger came careening out of nowhere effectively distracting both seekers. The Gryffindor seeker (whom I was fairly sure was a fifth year named O'Brian) tried to doge the bludger as it barreled towards his head... but he didn't make it out of the way in time and he began tumbling down to the Pitch.

"AND O'BRIAN IS DOWN!" The announcer yelled as the school's nurse could be seen making her way out onto the pitch. "TIME OUT!" The announced yelled again and the players quickly descended to check on their injured team mate.

I squinted through my binoculars trying to make out what was happening to O'Brian but the crowd of Gryffindor team mates blocked my view entirely. I yanked my binoculars away from my eyes and turned to Remus worried.

"You think he's okay?" I asked him, not really sure how bad Quidditch injuries could be. This was my first match (that I had actually payed attention to) and I could barely grasp the concept of how the game was played let alone understand the penalties, rules and injuries.

Remus lowered his binoculars to talk to me. "He'll be fine. I'm sure it's just a concussion." But he looked back towards the pitch with a worried look on his face as well.

I sighed and squinted back through my binoculars. O'Brian was on a floating cot now and I could see the nurse directing him out of the pitch.

Suddenly there was a bit of a scuffle down on the field. I could see boys clad in green becoming all mixed in with the red-clothed Gryffindors. Squinting even more I suddenly realized that the Slytherin and Gryffindor teams were engaged in a full-out muggle fist-fight.

"What's happening?" I screamed, unnecessarily loud, as my eyes darted around for a professor that would put a stop to their fight.

The fight on the pitch ended as the white-haired Dumbledore stepped onto the pitch. I could see James' mopping up blood from the reopened cut on his forehead. Beside him I could see Malfoy with a bloody nose looking far worse for the wear.

Dumbledore was talking to the team but I couldn't hear a word he said from all the way up in the stands. Thankfully the announced decided he should do his job and started filling us in with his loud booming voice.

"With O'Brian unable to continue the match and Gryffindor now without a seeker, Captain James Potter has offered to step in and take his place. This would, of course, would leave Gryffindor short a chaser and give Slytherin an advantage."

I gasped as I saw Dumbledore nod to James and then head back off the pitch. James yanked his knee guards off, jumped onto his broom and shot back up into the air.

"What's happening?" I asked, thoroughly confused as to what was going on.

Peter was the one who answered me this time. "Malfoy stole Nott's beater's bat and sent that bludger straight for O'Brian. Malfoy should be disqualified but without a seeker Gryffindor can't win the match. So James agreed to let Malfoy stay in the game as long as he could switch from being Chaser to Seeker."

"Now it's up to James to catch the snitch, if we have any chance of winning" Remus added.

Within seconds of the team being airborne the match began again. This time there was a whole new edge of desperation to the game. The Slytherin team, with their one player advantage, easily scored two goals within the first few minutes.

I groaned and had a feeling that our team was done for. Another ten minutes followed as Slytherin continued to edge ahead of Gryffindor. The score was now 220-170 in favour of the Slytherins.

Suddenly James was on the move. He and the Slytherin seeker were neck and neck as the golden snitch danced just out of their reach. I saw James expertly block a kick as the Slytherin seeker tried to knock James off his broom.

I gasped as I saw Nott and Sirius racing towards a hurtling bludger. Nott beat Sirius to it and sent it rocketing towards James who was determinedly chasing the snitch.

"James watch out!" I yelled furiously, although I knew he couldn't hear me all the way up in the stands.

Suddenly Sirius was right beside James and walloped the bludger with his bat. I cheered loudly as the bludger was shot towards the Slytherin seeker instead. The bludger collided with the back end of the seeker's broomstick causing twigs to spray out from the broom's tail. The Slytherin seeker steered (with difficulty) towards the ground.

With nothing left in his way, James leaned forward on his broom and shot towards the snitch. Two seconds later the little golden ball was clutched in his fist.

"AND GRYFFINDOR HAS THE SNITCH! GRYFFINDOR WINS!"

The the red and gold clad students in the stands (which I had noted earlier accounted for a comfortable two thirds of the stands) jumped to their feet cheering. The Gryffindor team flew up to James and started patting him on the back for winning them the game.

I was on my feet applauding just like everyone else.

"And you thought I was enthusiastic?" Remus laughed as I stood up on the bench waving and yelling at James when he looked our way.

"Come on. Let's head down to the pitch to congratulate them." Remus was pulling at my grey parka encouraging me to follow him. I jumped down from the bench, caught my balance, and shoving my binoculars into my pocket began to follow the rest of the students out of the bleachers.

On the snow covered Quidditch Pitch, the entire Gryffindor House was swarming around the House Team yelling and cheering and praising. I grabbed the sleeve of Remus' robes so I didn't loose him and Peter as we pushed through the crowd. There was Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws dabbled throughout the crowd and students from every year cheered in celebration.

As we met up with James and Sirius they were forced to endure another round of congratulations from us. James was ecstatic and pulled me into a too-tight huge, spinning me around laughing.

"Can't breathe... James..." I huffed. James looked at me guilty and let me down quickly. Remus shook James' hand and then James threw an arm over my shoulders.

Sirius had found his way back to us and slapped James on the back. "Prongs my boy! Now shouldn't we be celebrating properly?" He had the biggest grin on his face.

"Most definitely!" James laughed as Sirius tackled him down into the snow, the pair of them wresting.

I chuckled at their boyish fun. I turned to see the Slytherin team making their way back towards the castle, sullen and depressed. I smiled even more.

"Mr. Potter and Mr. Black would you please refrain from fighting on the Quidditch pitch. I would expect the Head Boy and Gryffindor Quidditch Captain to set a better example for his house!" Professor McGonagall had finally made her way down to the pitch as well. Although her voice was harsh her eyes were smiling. As Head of Gryffindor she was nothing but proud that we had won and effectively knocked Slytherin out of the running for the House Cup.

Sirius and James were just picking themselves off the ground as Sirius responded. "Of course Minnie! I always try to set the best example!" And then he was off running back towards the castle, Professor McGonagall pushing through the crowd to chase after him.

"Come on Lily!" I felt James slide his hand over mine and begin to tug me towards the castle. "We've got a party to attend to!"

Pulling my hat back down over my ears I gripped James' hand tighter as he led the way back up to the castle, the throng of Gryffindors, Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs following behind us.

* * *

><p>As we reached the Gryffindor Common Room I noticed how many students not in Gryffindor were strewn all about the Portrait of the Fat Lady.<p>

"What's going on here?" I asked to no-one in particular.

"A celebration party of course!" Sirius yelled as he came back around the corner, his arm slung around the brunette Hufflepuff from that morning at breakfast, apparently having ditched Professor McGonagall somewhere.

"A party?" I asked skeptically. As Head Girl it was my duty to prevent parties. I took a step forward to say just that when I felt James place a hand on my shoulder. I glanced over my shoulder to see him.

"Just let it go for tonight Lily," His eyes were pleading. "We all need a little pick-me-up."

_Didn't I know it_. I nodded at him before entering the Gryffindor Common Room, a gasp escaping my lips.

The Common Room was decorated in red and gold, streamers littered the walls and floors and never-ending sparklers danced from each candleholder.

Students from every year of Gryffindor, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff were crammed into the Common Room talking, laughing and celebrating. As it was a Quidditch celebration the House Team were still wearing their jerseys to honor their win. But this party was also about being victorious over the Slytherins and so there was also a green Slytherin robe that was being burnt in the fireplace. Thinking about what Nott had said to me earlier that week before potions, I decided to ignore it.

There was a table of sweets and refreshments (I remembered seeing Butterbeer but pointedly pretended I didn't notice). There were colorful bowls filled with chocolate frogs, peppermint toads, sugar quills, Fizzing Whizbees, jelly slugs, and Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans. I quickly snatched up a sugar quill to suck on, craving some sort of sugar, and sat down in an available armchair.

"Sirius mate!" James beckoned. "You got a minute?"

"Sure thing!" Sirius said pulling himself away from a small crowd of now upset looking girls and making over his way to James. The two boys stood together leaning against the wall looking like they ruled the school.

_Which_, I thought to myself as I took a bite out of the end of my sugar quill, _they pretty much do_.

"I just wanted to talk to you about the Marauder's ma..." James glanced sideways and caught me eavesdropping.

I smiled meekly, knowing it was pointless to pretend that I hadn't been, and turned away to find someone else to talk to. Spotting Emmeline Vance (a seventh year Ravenclaw prefect) over by the drinks table, I got up to go talk to her, pushing through the throng of celebrating students.

"Hey Emmeline," I greeted as I reached her.

Emmeline turned to look at me, her long brown hair falling slightly into her drink as she did so.

Laughing I reached forward to pull it out for her. Smiling embarrassedly Emmeline dabbed off her wet locks. "Thanks for that. It's probably about time I cut it," She chuckled slightly. "Want me to poor you a drink?" She asked politely.

I eyed the liquid swirling in the the glass drink bowl. "What is it?"

Emmeline shrugged. "Not sure, but it's fairly decent." She took another sip of her own drink.

"Sure, why not?" I said, not realizing how much I would later regret those words.

Emmeline passed me the cup full of drink and I carefully took a sip. Something in the drink burnt my throat slightly as I swallowed it down, but I decided its sweet taste was tolerable. "Ya it's decent," I agreed taking another small sip.

Emmeline was now eyeing a boy across the room. I gave her a slight push and she went off with a sheepish smile.

"Lily-bean!" Sirius yelped, popping up behind me and making me jump a foot in the air.

"Don't do that Sirius!" I scolded him. "And don't call me Lily-bean!" I glared at him.

Sirius shrugged and threw an arm around my shoulders squashing me to his side. "Having a nice drink then are you?" He asked me, eyeing my half empty cup.

I nodded. "Just some of this punch."

Sirius plucked the cup out of my hands and refilled it for me. "Right, well one can never have too much _punch_." He chuckled as if making a private joke... with himself.

"Right..."

"Padfoot!" James hollered from over near the fireplace. "Send Lily my way once you're done with her!"

Sirius raised his eyebrows at James, wiggling them at the implications James' sentence.

"Don't bother." James warned, pointing at Sirius knowingly.

Sirius shrugged and let his arm slide away from me. "It was too easy of a pun anyways," He said and he strolled off towards his fanclub.

I made my way back over to the fireplace and sat down next to James on the sofa he had managed to snag. I took another swig of my drink.

"What were you talking to Sirius about earlier?" I asked him, wondering if I was being too intrusive.

"Just Marauder stuff," James answered vaguely and I must have looked disappointed because he continued "I'll tell you about it later,"

I perked up and took another drink. "What has it been like being friends with Sirius all these years?"

"Never boring," James laughed.

I could see Sirius across the room, snogging the brunette Hufflepuff. The girl smiled while several other girls looked on enviously from behind. "He certainly has a certain charm when it comes to the ladies," I laughed.

James nodded, handing me another cup as my own was now empty. "He pretty much just goes with whatever angle he needs to win a girl over. He's very... smooth?" James slung his arm around me as I leaned back more into the sofa cushions. "But being a Marauder certainly has it perks."

I rubbed my eyes because they felt slightly blurry. "Like coercing girls into sleeping with you?"

"Apparently," James commented as the two of us watched Sirius lead the brunette up the stairs to the seventh year dormitories. "I'm just glad that you are immune to his charms,"

"Not immune," I said quickly. "More like disgusted."

As we both laughed I noticed that our laughter seemed slightly muted in my ears. I shook my head slightly as if it would fix the problem. It didn't.

"I feel funny," I muttered a while later as we had sat in comfortable silence watching the goings-on of the celebration party. Most of the younger students had retired up to bed. A lot of the remaining celebrators were dancing. I could hear music and figured someone had scrounged up a Wizarding Wireless. I looked down into my cup, the brown liquid inside fizzing slightly.

James turned to look at me, his eyes slightly hazy. "Funny? I do too." He looked down at his drink suspiciously. "I have to go find Sirius," He said suddenly getting to his feet. He swayed slightly before quickly sitting back down on the couch. "Nevermind, I know what's wrong." He tossed his drink cup and remaining drink into the fire.

"What?" I asked worriedly, my mind foggy and worrying. "Are we going to die?" I asked, suddenly and unexpectedly concerned that I was in fact going to die.

"No, no," James said waving his hand at me. "Just Sirius spiked the punch. And now we are both drunk."

My eyes grew wide. Me? Drunk? I'd never been drunk before! Was feeling confused what drunk was like?

"That's bad." I said, my eyes darting around as if I could tell just by looking who else had been drinking the "punch". My eyes landed on the group of seventh years dancing to some rock song on the Wireless. "Ou! There's music!" I exclaimed as if the music had only just started. "Let's dance James!" I squealed and pulled James off the couch.

I stumbled towards the dancers wondering why I didn't dance all the time. James was following behind me, a bit more steady on his feet than I was on mine. But being steady didn't matter one bit and I began to dance wildly to the music.

"James this is the bestest ever! I love being drunk!" I screamed quite a bit later as we jumped up to the beat of a song.

"Me too!" James yelled back running his hands sloppily down my sides.

I giggled and moved closer to him. I could feel the fogginess in my brain growing. And my throat felt parched.

"I'm thirsty!" I said stumbling into him. "Let's get more of that punch!" And I skipped off towards the drink table." I dunked a cup into the punch bowl and then downed it in one go.

"I'm purty sure that is alcohol!" I whispered to James conspiratorially, as if it was a huge secret.

James nodded and crossed his heart. "I won't tell anyone promise!"

I looked at him. His messy hair was sticking up at the back. He had removed his Quidditch robes and was now dressed in his red Quidditch jeresy with the word "Potter" stitched across the front in gold letters. I could see his muscles rippling through the shirt as he leaned forward to have another drink himself. I let my eyes wander down past his waist to his red Quidditch slacks. Even with my mind blurry, I vividly remembered what I had seen under those slacks just a few days previous.

"James!" I tugged on his shirt sleeve and he turned to look at me. I motioned him forward with my hand so I could whisper in his ear. "Guess what?"

"What?" James leaned down so I could cup his ear with my hand.

I moved so that my lips were almost touching the side of his ear. I giggled and then whispered "I saw you naked and I liked it!"

And that was the last thing I remembered.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Chapter 4 complete! I hope everyone enjoyed the more spirited version of the Marauders and the building heat between Lily and James. Drunk Lily was fun to write. Hehe!

Also I hope everyone enjoyed the extra long chapter! There was just so much that had to fit into this one! LOL!

The song that Lily was singing to James is called "Here Today, Gone Tomorrow" and was originally from the 1968 album _Observations in Time_.

**_Thank you to everyone who has been reviewing so far! I love reading what your opinions are!_**

**_And thanks to everyone else for simply reading my story! Because that's what it's all about!_**

This story has 12 more chapters to come. Please R&R to let me know if you like it and if you want me to post more!


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